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Unfiltered Story #134151

, , , | Unfiltered | December 28, 2018

Customer: “What about the [vomitous bargain brand] ham? Is that one good?”

Me: “No, it isn’t.”

Customer: “What? No? What do you mean, no?!”

Me: “Well, it is the cheapest brand we carry, sir. Cheaper brands are generally lower-quality. And that company, in particular, has been investigated by the government multiple times for the inhumane and unsanitary conditions at its factories.”

Customer: “Well, if it’s no good, then why do you sell it?!”

Me: “Because Americans are shameful, honorless pigs who will sacrifice quality and standards for the sake of cheaply and instantly gratifying their base, caveman desires, even to the point of slowly killing themselves.”


Customer: “Okay, then. I’ll take a pound.”