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    Your Stupidity Has No Match

    | Springfield, MO, USA |

    Me: “Hello, how can I help you today?”

    Customer: “Yes, I wanted to take advantage of your price match policy on this refrigerator.”

    (He hands me copy of competitor’s ad with said refrigerator.)

    Me: “Okay, do you have your receipt?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: “That’s okay, I can look it up.”

    (After utilizing several different ways to look up a receipt, I still haven’t found one.)

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m having a hard time finding your receipt and without that, I can’t give you your money.”

    Customer: “I haven’t bought the refrigerator from you.”

    Me: “Oh! Ok, so you want to purchase it and match the price?”

    Customer: “No! I purchased the refrigerator from [competitor's store] and you have it cheaper, so I want you guys to pay me the difference.”

    Me: “So, let me get this straight. You bought a refrigerator from [competitor's store] and we have it cheaper here, so you want me to give you money for a fridge that you didn’t purchase from here, and have no intentions of purchasing from here?”

    Customer: “Right! Your price match plus guarantee!”

    Me: “Ma’am, in order for us to give you the difference, you would have had to purchase the item from our store.”

    Customer: “That’s false advertising! You have to give me the money! I’m going to sue!”

    Me: “Ma’am, unfortunately we can’t just give you money for something you didn’t purchase from us.”

    Customer: “Why not?”

    Me: “Well, we wouldn’t make any money then and the company would go out of business.”

    Customer: “Like that’s my fault!” *storms out of store*