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  • I Say Potato, You Say Something Obscene

    | Port Clinton, OH, USA |

    (A customer has ordered two beef subs.)

    Me: “What veggies would you like on the first one?”

    Customer: “Pickles, onions, tomatoes, and h*** penis.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, pickles, onions, tomatoes, and what now?”

    Customer: “H*** penis. And mustard.”

    Me: “Okay. You said jalapenos, right?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: “Alright, then.”

    (I put everything else on, then ask if I’ve missed anything.)

    Customer: “The h*** penis.”

    Me: “Jalapenos?”

    Customer: “No.”

    (I point at the jalapenos.)

    Me: “These?”

    Customer: “Yes! God! I only said it, like, three times!”