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    You Can’t Fix Stupid

    | Alberta, Canada | Extra Stupid

    (I am calling back a customer who had a 6-year-old TV with a cracked screen. Unfortunately, due to its age, we can no longer get parts for it.)

    Me: “Hello, we’d like to let you know that unfortunately we are unable to repair your product. The parts are discontinued.”

    Customer: “So, you can’t fix it?”

    Me: “Correct.”

    Customer: “So you can fix it?”

    Me: “No, the parts are unavailable.”

    Customer: “Can you order them?”

    Me: “No, the parts are discontinued.”

    Customer: “You can order them somewhere else, yes?”

    Me: “No, we cannot fix this unit at all.”

    Customer: “Does [brand name] carry the part?”

    Me: “No, they don’t.”

    Customer: “Okay, so you can get it fixed, right? Test it again?”

    Me: “No, we cannot fix it.”

    Customer: “So it can’t be fixed?”

    Me: “It cannot be fixed, ever, unfortunately.”

    Customer: “Okay, I’ll call you back when it’s done!” *click*