(Please note that I have a rather generic first name for the US, generic like, say, John or Mike.)

Me: “Thank you for calling ******* Tech Shop, ***** speaking. Can I help you?”

Irate customer: “Can I speak to a f**king American?”

Me: “Last time I checked, I’m an American. Can I help you?”

Customer: “Oh yeah? Well where are you!?”

Me: “Mount Laurel, New Jersey–in the store you called.”

Customer: “That sounds like it’s in India.”

Me: “Unless New Jersey has moved recently, we’re part of the US…”

Customer: “Just let me speak to an American, d**n it!”

“Yes sir, please hold.”

(At this point I transferred him to the Wilmington, DE store, as we do with many of our irate customers.)