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    Witless Vs Witness

    | Kingston, ON, Canada |

    (I am checking out an elderly woman. Off to the side is a younger woman, waiting impatiently and tapping her foot.)

    Impatient customer: “Excuse me!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. I’m just finishing up with this lady here, and I’ll be right with you.”

    (The impatient customer lets out a loud sigh, and walks out the door. She talks to her boyfriend. He then comes in.)

    Impatient customer’s boyfriend: “What the h***, bro? Were you just rude to my woman?”

    Me: “No, actually. Quite the opposite. Your friend was rude to this lady here as I was still waiting on her.”

    Impatient customer’s boyfriend: “Whatever, bro. You’re lucky I don’t come over there and kick your a**.”

    (The elderly customer claps, looking at me.)

    Elderly customer: “I’ll stay and watch and be your witness!”

    (The boyfriend doesn’t know what to say, and then hesitantly leaves.)