Wingardium Laziosa

Customer: “I can’t find the Cliff’s Notes for Harry Potter. Could you order them for me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, they don’t make Cliff’s Notes for Harry Potter.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous. They have Cliff’s Notes for everything. Why don’t you look it up?”

Me: “Actually, they don’t have Cliff’s Notes for everything, especially not for children’s books.”

Customer: “They aren’t children’s books.”

Me: “They’re shelved in the children’s section.”

Customer: “Adults read them too. You don’t have them so I’d like to order them.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but they don’t exist.”

Customer: “That’s a lie. There’s a computer right in front of you. Look up Cliff’s Notes and find them!”

(I look up Cliff’s Notes and show the customer the extensive list. After a few minutes of frustrated searching, she gives up.)

Customer: “This is ridiculous! I want to know what they’re about, but I don’t want to read them.”

Me: “May I suggest the movies, in that case?”

Customer: “I’m not stupid! I’ve seen the movies! I just don’t want to read the books!”

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