When Push Comes To Shove, Don’t

(We are holding an audition for our company’s new season. We will often take dancers who aren’t as technically trained if they are easy to work with.)

Dancer: “Hello? Can you please take my forms? I’m ready to audition.”

Me: “I’m sorry, you’re number 256 and we’re only calling numbers 110-114 right now. You’ll have to wait.”

Dancer: “Are you f***ing kidding me? I’ve already been here an hour!”

(She tries to shove her papers in my hand.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but you’ll have to wait with the rest of the dancers.”

(She tries to shover her papers in my hand again.)

Me: “I’m sorry—”

(Suddenly, she storms into the audition out of turn and complains about how I won’t let her dance to our casting director. They let her dance only because she refuses to leave. After her “audition”…)

Dancer: “Do you think I made it?”