Welcome To Scoff-Fuss Depot

(A male customer comes in looking for the copiers to enlarge a photo. I assist him with his copies and then return to my register. The customer continues to browse the baskets by the register.)

Customer: *holds up a flashlight* “What’s this?”

Me: “That’s a flashlight, sir.”

Customer: *holds up a packet of Post-its* “What’s this?”

Me: “Those are Post-it flags. They have adhesive on the back of one end so you can use them to mark pages in books.”

Customer: “Adhesive, huh? Sure…” *gives me a knowing smile*

Me: *confused*

Customer: *holds up some speakers* “So, what are these? Little TVs?”

Me: “No, sir… those are speakers.”

Customer: *looks slightly alarmed* “Speakers? For what?”

Me: “For a computer, sir.”

Customer: *rolls eyes* “Computers! You know, I feel terrible for leaving here without a present for the grandkids, but EVERYTHING you sell these days is poison or dynamite! It’s not SAFE!” *storms out of the store*