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    Wearing Law Suits Will Get You Law Suits

    | Austin, TX, USA | Crazy Requests

    (My friends and I are on a mock trial team. We’re all about sixteen, and we have to wear suits to court, like a real trial. We were using a courtroom that no one was using for the day. During a recess, the doors burst open and a woman storms in.)

    Woman: “I demand a lawyer!”

    Us: “Uh…”

    Woman: “You! You there!”

    Me: “Who, me?”

    Woman: “Yes! I want you to be my lawyer!”

    Me: “Ma’am, I’m not a real lawyer.”

    Woman: “But you’re in a courtroom! People in courtrooms are lawyers. That’s why I came here to get one.”

    Me: “We’re just using it because there’s no one here today. This is a mock trial.”

    Woman: “But you’ve got a briefcase!”

    Me: “Ma’am, that does have our case information in it, but it’s not a real case. This is mock trial. It simulates a trial. It’s supposed to be exactly like a real one, but…it’s…not.”

    Woman: “You’re not a real lawyer? I’m going to sue you for false advertisement. I bet you haven’t even gone to law school!”

    Me: “No, I haven’t. And that’s not exactly how suing someone works. I mean, would you sue Tom Cruise for playing a lawyer in A Few Good Men even though he’s not one?”

    *pause*

    Woman: “But…but you’re wearing a suit!”