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    Warning: Movie May Require Brain Cells

    | Arkansas, USA |

    Customer: “This is a readin’ movie. Do I have to pay fer this? It’s a readin’ movie. Ya’ know, where ya’ have to read it?”

    Me: “You mean it had subtitles?”

    Customer: “Yeah! Those! I don’t have to pay for that, do I?”

    Me: “Well, we really don’t do preferential refunds because it isn’t our obligation to make sure the customer likes the movie. We just make it available.”

    Customer: “That’s bullcrap!”

    (He skulks away from my register and hangs around the candy display as the next customer walks up laughing.)

    Me, to the next customer: “Hello, ma’am. How’re you doing today? Good? That’s great. Before we start here, I’d like to warn you that this magazine you’re about to purchase is a readin’ magazine, and that we don’t give refunds. Sorry.”

    (The previous disgruntled customer, who obviously heard everything I said, is completely oblivious to the fact that I’m mocking him.)