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  • Turn The Tables

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Food & Drink, Money

    (We have a coupon for a free entrée. A new waitress comes up and asks me a question.)

    Co-Worker: “How do I handle two coupons?”

    Me: “What?”

    Co-Worker: “My table of three by the window. They got the entrées and waters. They want to use two coupons.”

    Me: “They can’t use two coupons. It says ‘one per group’. Tell her to save it for next week.”

    Co-Worker: “She says they are two groups. So they want to use two coupons.”

    Me: “They can’t use two coupons because it’s only one check.”

    (She leaves, but comes back a few minutes later.)

    Co-Worker: “She says she wants separate checks.”

    Me: “Tell her she can’t have separate checks just because she wants to use two coupons.”

    (She leaves, but comes back a few minutes later.)

    Co-Worker: “They want to talk to a manager.”

    (A third co-worker and I argue over what to do, as the manager isn’t here tonight. Reluctantly, I go out to the table, posing as the manager. I tell them the same thing that the waitress told them.)

    Me: “Ma’am our policy is that coupons can only be used one per group. You are all obviously one group, as you are sitting at the same table.”

    (Irately, the woman grabs the table; which happens to be two separate tables placed together, and moves them about six inches apart.)

    Customer: “There. Now we are two separate tables.”

    Me: *trying to remain courteous* “I’ll see what I can do.”

    (I go back, separate the checks, apply the discounts, and take both checks to the table.)

    Me: “I can take that when you are ready.”

    (She fishes in her purse, and hands me her credit card.)

    Customer: “Use my card to pay for both!”