(I’m in line at a grocery store in a tiny town in the North Carolina mountains. In front of me is an old woman who’s moving rather slowly. Behind me is a young suit who has no patience.)

Old Woman: “Now is this one on sale, sugar?”

Young Suit: *muttering loudly behind her* “This is bulls***.”

Old Woman: “I got me two, no, three coupons.”

Young Suit: *even louder* “Some of us have places to be.”

Old Woman: “I think I got me two pennies, darling. Just a minute.”

Young Suit: “Come on, come on, get your a** in gear!”

Old Woman: “Young man, if you was a-wantin’ to get there so early, you should have left home sooner!”

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Time Waits For Slow Man