This Is Lazy, But Here’s The Number, So Help Yourself Maybe
(I’m with my parents at a large chain hardware store. I’ve wandered off to the garden section and am minding my own business while looking at some potted plants.)
Customer: “Excuse me! How much are the potted plants out front?”
Employee: “I’ll help you out in just one second, okay? I have to unload this pallet right away, but I’ll be right with you.”
Customer: “You’re useless!” *comes up to me* “Excuse me! how much are the potted plants?”
Me: *looks around* “…Me? Oh, I don’t work here. I do believe that man told you he’d be right with you, though.”
Customer: “You work here, I know you do. Don’t lie! You just want to be lazy.”
Me: “No… I don’t work here. Sorry.”
Customer: “You just want to be lazy!” *stomps over to the registers* “Excuse me, but your employees are being lazy and won’t tell me how much the potted plants are.”
Employee #2: “Ma’am, I heard my coworker tell you he’d be right with you, and that girl doesn’t work here.”
Customer: “Sure, she doesn’t! She just wants to be lazy. HOW MUCH ARE THE D*** PLANTS?!”
Employee #2: “Well, which ones?”
Customer: “THE POTTED PLANTS!”
Employee #2: “Ma’am, we have many potted plants here—”
Customer: “THE D*** ONES UP FRONT!”
Employee #2: “Ma’am, there’s a rather large neon yellow sign in front of the rack they’re on. The price is on there.”
Customer: “Well, why didn’t someone say so?!”



