This Customer Defies Natural Selection

(I work in a tile store.)

Me: “Do you have any questions or need any samples?”

Customer: “I do have a question on this tile in here.”

(The customer shows me a natural stone travertine that has a lot of variation through it.)

Customer: “I love the look of this tile. Can I just get this tile pattern on this one tile? I don’t like these other ones.”

Me: “Sir, natural stone varies, so no two tiles will look alike. You will get the same colors generally, but not the exact same pattern. You can see the change in the other tiles next to it. They are actually all the same tile.”

Customer: “You don’t know what you’re talking about. Tile doesn’t vary. You can make it look however you want. I saw it on TV. That ‘how to make stuff’ show.”

Me: “Sir, this is a natural material made by nature. I have no control over what patterns and colors come out of the mountain.”

Customer: “Well, you should talk to your supplier about that. This is just ugly. I hate natural stone.”