(A customer paying by check tries to use the stylus from the debit machine to fill out her check.)

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, but that’s not a real pen.”

(I reach into my pocket to give her a real one, but she continues “writing” with the stylus.)

Me: “Ma’am? That’s not a real pen.”

(She stops and shakes the stylus to get the ink flowing.)

Me: “Ma’am, you can’t use that to write with.”

(She continues shaking the stylus and trying to write.)

Me: “That’s not a pen!”

Customer: “Hey, this pen doesn’t work!”

Me: *giving up* “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I forgot to put ink in those pens this morning…” hands her the real pen* “…here, use this.”

Customer: “Thanks!”