Customer: “This phone doesn’t hang on the wall right. The handle keeps falling off.”

(Knowing exactly what’s wrong, I fix the phone on the spot. It’s a simple fix.)

Customer: “How did you do that?”

Me: “I turned this little tab around so the handle catches on it.”

Customer: “How did you know that?”

Me: “Didn’t the instructions tell you how?”

Customer:  *snorts* “I don’t have time to read the instructions!”

Me: “But you had time to return it and complain?”