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    There Is No Tea In the Virgin Islands

    | Milwaukee, WI, USA |

    Customer: “Hey, I want a drink without any alcohol. What do you have?”

    Me: “Well, can I get you a soda or something? Maybe some juice?”

    Customer: “Can I get a virgin long island?”

    Me: “You mean, you want an iced tea?”

    Customer: “No, I want a virgin long island.”

    Me: “But, a long island is mostly alcohol. I mean, there are five shots in it. Then some sour and some coke. Do you want a glass of sour and coke?”

    Customer: “Is that alcoholic?”

    (I give up and hand her an iced tea.)

    Customer, turning to a friend: *excitedly* “I got a virgin long island!”