Me: “Thank you for calling ***. How can I direct your call?”

Customer: “Do you have any of those things you can put on tables?”

Me: “Like a table cloth?”

Customer: “No. They’re those things you can put on tables.”

Me: “Ma’am, you can put a lot of things on tables.”

Customer: “Well I don’t know what they’re called! You’re the one who should know!”

Me: *face on desk*