(A man and his son are swimming in the pool. The boy’s mother is sitting in the viewing area until she approaches me. Policy states that proper swim-wear must be worn, i.e. no t-shirts.)

Mother: “How can you discriminate like this!”

Me: “I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about ma’am.”

Mother: “You won’t let me go swimming with my boy! Look how happy he is, I want to share that with him!”

Me: “You can go swimming as much as you’d like. You just have to put a swim suit on first.”

Mother: “Exactly! Look at me! I can’t find a suit that would fit me!”

Me: “Why, I’m sure that’s not true. I get mine at [local sporting goods store] and they come in many different sizes.”

Mother: “Yes, but none of those are cute!”