Caller: “I need to track a couple of shipments. Can you look those up for me?”

Me: “Sure. What are the invoice numbers?”

Caller: “The tracking numbers are [tracking numbers].”

Me: “I see that both deliveries were made last week. Do you think the boxes were lost in transit?”

Caller: “No, they’re right here on my desk. I just need proof that they were delivered.”

Me: *temporarily speechless* “Well, have a nice day!”

Caller: “You do the same!”