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    The Grinch Who Shocked Christmas

    | PA, USA |

    (It is December and Christmas decorations have been recently put up throughout town. I recognize our town manager, in the store. She is responsible for all the towns’ decorations.)

    Me: *as I am ringing up her books* “I love all the lights downtown!”

    Town Manager: “Thank you!”

    Me: “My favorite is the reindeer topiary garden!”

    Town Manager: *scowling* “Well they do look nice, but unfortunately the children like them too.

    Me: *confused* “Excuse me?”

    Town Manager: “The children! They are always trying to touch the reindeer.”

    Me: “I’m sure they’re very excited about Christmas, and hearing all about Rudolph.”

    Town Manager: “The decorations are for looking at! Not for touching! I suggested electricity but no one liked that idea.”

    Me: “You suggested what?”

    Town Manager: “Just a light jolt, to discourage the children!”

    (I am stunned and silent.)

    Town Manager: “No, no one else liked that idea either.”

    Me: “Here are your books! Happy holidays!”