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    The Customer Might Not Be Telling The Whole Tooth

    | Farmington, NM, USA | Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers, Theme Of The Month

    Me: “Welcome to [Pizza Restaurant]! Did you already have an order?”

    Customer: “No. Well sort of; I have a complaint for a pizza I just got.”

    Me: “Okay, I’m the manager on duty at the moment. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Well, I just got this pizza, and I bit into it, and, well, there was a tooth in it.”

    Me: “I’m sorry, a tooth?”

    Customer: “Yeah, it looked like it was cooked. It’s real black.”

    (The area I live in has a meth abuse problem, as well as a lower than average annual income, so dental hygiene is not a strength of this particular community. As the customer is talking, I notice he has several rotten and black teeth, as well as several missing.)

    Me: “Um, okay. Do you have the pizza and, erm, tooth with you?”

    (He hands the pizza and tooth to me. The tooth indeed looks very blackened, though obviously not from cooking. I excuse myself to let the owner know the situation, and I enter his office at the time he is on the phone.)

    Owner: “No, ma’am, we don’t have security cameras outside the store. Did you let anyone know you had fallen? So you decided it wasn’t an issue over two years ago when you did slip and fall on our sidewalk, but suddenly it’s a problem for you? Well, I’m sorry, but without some sort of proof that you fell on our property, there isn’t much we can do for you. Very well, you can have your lawyer contact ours. Have a good day.”

    (The owner hangs up and looks at me.)

    Owner: “Your problem can’t possibly be worse than the lady I just dealt with. She claims she injured herself a few winters ago by slipping on ice on the sidewalk.”

    Me: “I think you’d be surprised.”