(A regular customer comes into our store. She’s known to be very difficult to please.)

Customer: “Good evening.”

Me: *cheerily, while ringing her items up* “Good evening, ma’am! That’s $5.31, please.”

(She puts a credit card down in front of me, which I ring through the register.)

Me: “If you could please sign right there…”

(I point, and she does. I bag her items and hand her the bag, her credit card, and her receipt. She takes them slowly and I think I’ve done a good job, but apparently not.)

Customer: “You dishonor me! You dishonor me and you will burn for it!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am.”

Customer: “God honors me! You don’t, and you will burn! I don’t know, I’m not God. But that’s what he’s saying. You dishonor me and you will burn!” *walks away*

Me: *totally speechless*