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    The Code Has Three ‘X’s In It

    , | USA | Rude & Risque

    (I’ve been on the phone for a good ten minutes at this point with a woman in her late 80s who has a strong Southern accent. She has been extremely prim and proper for the entire call.)

    Me: “And do you have the offer code?”

    Caller: “Offer code? What’s that, dear?”

    Me: “It should be printed on the order form near where your name is located.”

    Caller: “One moment. Oh, I found it!”

    Me: *waits*

    Caller: *silence*

    Me: “Ma’am, may I have the code please?”

    Caller: “Oh, of course, sweetie. It’s F as in ‘f***.’ D as in ‘d***.’ A as in ‘a**.'”

    (The caller pauses before continuing, suddenly sounding very smug.)

    Caller: “All of which I enjoy a great deal when it comes to my men.”

    (I still have no idea how I managed to hold in my laughter until after I finished placing her order.)