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    Assassin’s Crib

    | Springfield, MO, USA | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule

    (My husband and I have a favorite game store because they tend to treat females very well. We have a two-year-old daughter who has been loving the games as much as we have.)

    Cashier: “Is that all for you?”

    Husband: “Oh, I have a few pre-orders to make.”

    Cashier: “No problem.”

    (I’m holding our daughter. I find a game case she likes, ‘Assassin’s Creed’.)

    Me: “Look baby, it is your favorite!”

    Daughter: “Ezio!”

    Cashier: “Did she just!?”

    Me: “No, no, this is Conner. But I bet he is just as cool as—”

    Daughter:No! Ezio! Ezio! Ezio!”

    (I didn’t know what was better: My daughter saying Ezio’s name over and over, or the cashier trying to stay professional and not squeal at a two year old.)

    Weekly Roundup: Video Game Stores!

    | Not Always Right | Geeks Rule, Roundups

    Weekly Roundup: Video Game Stores! This week, we feature five stories of stupid customers in video game stores that’ll have you wii-shing for a reset button!

    1. And Just Think, You’ll Meet Them In Multiplayer (2,529 thumbs up)
    2. How A DS RPG Killed The ESRB (3,271 thumbs up)
    3. Ask And Ye Shall Receive (5,892 thumbs up)
    4. No Good Deed Goes Unpunished (5,331 thumbs up)
    5. Bribery (Adjusted For Inflation) (2,637 thumbs up)

    PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

    PS #2: Read more roundups here!

    Purchasing Identity Crysis

    | New York, NY, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

    (Usually, Black Friday at our store is organized and lined up, but it usually leads to people getting impatient and loud with us. If one person holds up the line, the rest get extremely upset. It’s the worst when customers trade a whole bunch of games to us when there’s a huge line behind them.)

    Coworker: “Okay, so the total amount of these trades that you’ll be getting back would be $54.46 in store credit, or $23 in cash.”

    Customer: “Are you serious?! I paid over hundreds of dollars for these games and they cost only $20 in cash? You guys are thieves! Just give me my damn cash then!”

    Coworker: “Well, I don’t control the prices here, sir. Alright, so I’d like to see your State ID please so we can continue to process these trades.”

    Customer: *getting paranoid* “Why do you want to see my ID? Obviously I look old enough to trade games, don’t I? I’m not giving you my ID. Thieving my identity!”

    Coworker: “I can’t process the trade without seeing some State ID, sir.”

    (I overhear the issue, and notice that people are getting edgy in line because this man is holding it up. I approach my co-worker.)

    Me: “What’s going on here?”

    Customer: *rudely interrupts my coworker before he can reply* “Your employee here is trying to steal my identification and gives me a BS amount on my games so he can sell it back on the wall for twice of what it’s worth!”

    Me: “Sir, we don’t control the trade amounts and that’s how the prices are processed. Business is business, but we’re not trying to swindle or steal anything from you, I can assure you.”

    Customer: “Then why do you need to see my ID for the games? Just take them and give me my f***ing cash!”

    Me: “It’s store policy and for authority purposes only. We would have no reason to take your ID but we cannot go through with the transaction if we can’t see your ID, so that means you won’t be getting your cash at all unless we just see the ID for a minute and we’ll hand it right back to you.”

    Customer: *huffs and holds out driver’s license* “Here but don’t touch it!”

    (My coworker strains to see the information to type in, because the customer refuses to stand any closer with it and complete the process.)

    Customer: “Can you put the cash on my credit card?”

    Coworker: “Sure, just swipe your card here and I’ll see the last four digits of your credit card.”

    Customer: “Why do you need to see all this personal information!? You guys are stealing from me, you a**holes! Not only my games but from me, too!”

    Me: “Sir, you’re holding up the line. If you plan to make a scene, please speak with my manager so he can explain it to you.”

    Manager: *already hearing the outburst* “Honestly, we’re not trying to steal anything from you and these games aren’t even worth it. Somehow, you’re making it worse for yourself by shouting because you’re raising suspicion on yourself. I would greatly appreciate it if you would just realize the fifty something people behind you and get this over with because most of them here have done a trade themselves and not once have they complained about any thievery. Now, please, restrain yourself because there’s children here, or I’ll ask you to leave the store and keep your games with you.”

    (The customer grumbles obscenities under his breath, and holds out his card in an annoyingly far distance yet again, then proceeds to sign and storms out.)

    Acting Like Wario

    | New York, NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Bigotry, Theme Of The Month

    Customer: “Hi do you guys have any Mario games?”

    Me: “Yes of course, what system would that be for?”

    Customer: “…What?”

    Me: “What game system would you like that Mario game for, sir? We have them for the Wii, DS, and 3DS at the moment. We also might have a few used Gamecube ones.”

    Customer: “Look, my son just wants a d*** Mario game. Can’t you just give me one?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t. There are literally dozens of different Mario titles for a bunch of different systems.”

    (The customer looks up at the consoles behind me.)

    Customer: “I think he has that… uh… Playstation there.”

    Me: “Well, in that case, I can’t sell you any Mario game because they don’t ma—”

    Customer: “God d*** it! I just want to buy my son a f***ing Mario game! Why is that so d*** hard?!”

    Me: “They don’t make them for Playstation.”

    Customer: “Don’t you know that the customer is always right you little s***?! I drive all this way to buy my son a Mario game, and you don’t even know what you’re talking about!”

    Me: “Unless we know what system he has, I can’t help you sir. It could be for the Wii, DS, 3DS, or the Gamecube.”

    Customer: “Oh, so now you’re refusing me service?! I’d like to speak to your supervisor you little punk!”

    (My manager has had enough at this point.)

    Manager: “Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

    Customer: “I’m not going anywhere! I know my rights!”

    Manager: “Okay then, I’m going to call security. I recommend you leave before they arrive.”

    Customer: “I thought nerds were supposed to be smart!” *leaves*

    Babysitting Him Earns You A Halo

    | Cincinnati, OH, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

    (I am ringing up a regular, who has brought her younger brother with her. This particular customer has spent a very large amount of money on both games and systems, and has a very large reserve list. Everything she buys is paid for with money that she earned herself.)

    Me: “Would you like to reserve anything coming up?”

    Regular: “Hmm… anything you could recommend?”

    Me:Call of Duty, Hitman, maybe Halo 4?”

    Regular’s Brother: “Eww, don’t get Halo!”

    Regular: “I’ll go ahead and reserve Halo.”

    Regular’s Brother:Halo is dumb!”

    Me: “You want to put $5 down on Halo 4?”

    Regular: “Yes, please!”

    Regular’s Brother: “Why the h*** are you getting Halo?”

    Me: “Will that be all?”

    Regular’s Brother: “Don’t get Halo!”

    Regular: *ignoring her brother* “Yup, that’s it!”

    Me: “Your total is [total].”

    Regular’s Brother: “I told you don’t get Halo! God, you are so freaking dumb! You’re just getting Halo 4 to play with your stupid boyfriend!”

    (The regular hands me the money and then looks to her brother.)

    Regular: “It’s my money! And don’t you even sass me! I’ll lock the Xbox in my room again!” *to me* “I’m sorry about the kid. I don’t know what his deal is!”

    Me: “It’s no problem. You have a great day!”

    Regular: “You have a good day, too!” *to her brother* “I’ll make sure dad knows that you were being a jerk today! You will be so grounded!”

    (She grabs her brother by the arm and drags him out of the store, telling him off for his behavior all the way.)

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