Tis The Season To Be Tired (Of Customers)

, | San Mateo, CA, USA | Holidays

(During the Christmas season, we managers at my store often work 12+ hour days. This day is one of them, and I have been there since 7:30 in the morning; it is now 8 pm. A customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Wow, you sure look tired. When did you start?”

Me: “7:30–”

Customer: “That’s the problem with today’s generation. Can’t work a full day without looking like they are falling asleep!”

Me: “AM, sir.”

Customer: “Oh…” *walks off with a blank stare on his face*

An Immoral Pleasure Seeker

| UK | Family & Kids

(I work in a toy shop where we sell giant Bratz dolls. A customer comes over with one and asked whether or not it would be suitable for her two year old daughter.)

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, I wouldn’t recommend this doll for any child under the age of 6.”

Customer: “Why is this doll recommended for 6 years and over? My daughter’s two but she really wants one.”

Me: “Well, I can’t really recommend that you buy the doll for a younger child, but I suppose if you remove the earrings then there wouldn’t be any small parts.”

Customer: *looks the doll over* “Is it just because she’s dressed like a hooker?”

Because 8 Bajillion Signs Are Always The Answer, Part 2

, | Nebraska, USA |

Me: “Your total will be [total price].”

Customer: “That seems a little high. Were the Imaginext items buy one, get one free?”

(I check the items and see if they’re scanning correctly in the register.)

Me: “Yes, they are, but you have 3 Imaginext items and one non-Imaginext item, so that won’t ring up on sale.”

Customer: “Well, they’re all in the same aisle!”

Me: “Well, yes, but just because one item is on sale doesn’t mean everything in the aisle is on sale as well.”

Customer: “Well, you should put that on your signs!”

Related:
Because 8 Bajillion Signs Are Always The Answer

E Is For Close Enough

| Davenport, IA, USA | Family & Kids

(Overheard in the video game section of a toy store.)

Kid: “That’s the game!”

(The father picks it up to read it as his child waits impatiently.)

Kid: “That’s the one! Let’s go!”

Father: “Hang on. I need to see if this is the right game for you.”

Kid: “But it’s rated ‘E!’ ‘E’ stands for ‘Anybody!'”

And Tell Voldemort He’s Next

| St. Louis, MO, USA | Geeks Rule

(I work in a toy store in a local mall. One day a man comes in and stands awkwardly to one side for a long while. I realize that something is…off about him, mentally. Finally, he approaches me.)

Me: “Hi, how may I help you today?”

Customer: “Have you seen Bellatrix Lestrange?”

Me: “We don’t carry any Harry Potter toys, but you might be able to find some Harry Potter stuff at Hot Topic.”

Customer: *looking completely serious* “No, I’m looking for Bellatrix. I’ve already killed Malfoy and now I’m looking for that b****.”

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