October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Over(bear)ing Demand

, | Louisville, KY, USA | Uncategorized

(A customer in his late 20s walks into the store looking confused.)

Me: “Can I help you find anything today?”

Customer: “My niece is asking for something. I don’t know if it exists or not, but she asked for a rainbow colored bear that smells like fruit.”

Me: “Actually, sir, I know exactly what you are talking about.”

(I lead him to the girls section where there is a new toy bear in stock. It’s multicolored and is scented like bubble gum.)

Me: “Here you go, sir!”

Customer: “Oh, is this all you have?”

Me: “Well, there are other bears but this is the only scented one.”

Customer: “I’m just not sure this is it.”

Me: “I can assure you sir, this is the only rainbow colored and fruit scented bear toy in the entire store.”

We Live In That Kind Of Sue-ciety

, | Baton Rouge, LA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Hello, did you find what you wanted today?”

Customer: “Kind of. I would like to purchase this toy but there’s a problem.”

Me: “And what is that?”

Customer: “This toy doesn’t come with the manual.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, sir, but most things sold here do not come with the manual. This is a second-hand store.”

Customer: “I understand that. but you obviously do not understand what I’m saying to you. I need the manual before I can buy this.”

Me: “And why is that, sir?”

Customer: “If this toy bursts into flames, how am I going to know who to sue?”

A Wii Bit Of Borderline Arrogance

| New Hampshire | Uncategorized

Customer: “Do you have any Wiis?”

Me: “No sir, Wiis are all sold out.”

(Customer pulls out a badge and flashes it briefly.)

Customer: “You sure you don’t have any Wiis?”

Me: “No sir, no Wiis. What exactly was that badge?”

Customer: “Border Patrol.”

(This being New Hampshire, I have to ask:)

Me: “Which border?”

Customer: “Canadian.”

(Customer walks away with a self-important air.)

Cultural Diversity Is A-Dora-ble

| Ontario, Canada | Uncategorized

(A customer wearing very affluent clothing walks over holding a “Dora the Explorer” plush doll.)

Customer: “Hello, can you help me?”

Me: “Certainly, what I can I do for you?”

Customer: “I’m looking one of these, but in white.”

Me: “Oh, you mean like this?” *shows the customer a similar plush toy but wearing a white dress*

Customer: “NO! NO! One that is WHITE!”

Me: *puzzled* “I’m sorry, but this is the only other one we have in stock…did you see it on our website? Was it another style of clothing?”

Customer: “NO! WHITE, LIKE ME!” *points at her face*

Me: “You mean…a Caucasian Dora?”

Customer: “YES! Where do you have them?”

Me: “Ma’am, Dora was designed to help people from different backgrounds come to understand their common ground; Dora therefore doesn’t come in a different skin tone. She is what she is.”

Customer: “WHAT? That is RIDICULOUS! Give me a WHITE DORA!”

Me: “I’m very sorry ma’am, but they simply don’t exist…”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll take my business elsewhere!” *storms out*

They Start So Young

| San Jose, CA, USA | Uncategorized

(A girl of about 8 years old is staring longingly at the display of stickers we have by the cash register.)

Girl: “I’d love to have some of these stickers, but I don’t have any money.” *sighs loudly*

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that.”

Girl: “…so are you going to give me some for free, or what?”

Me: “…”

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