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    Lack Of Grey Matter, Part 3

    | Kent, UK | Tourists/Travel

    (During an audio/visual experience of the siege of 1216 within a castle, I am approached by a tourist.)

    Tourist: “Excuse me, sir. Can you help me with a question?”

    Me: “Of course. What would you like to know?”

    Tourist: “Is the footage being shown actual live footage of the siege of 1216?”

    Me: “You want to know if this video is showing actual footage of the siege of 1216?”

    Tourist: “How silly of me. They only had black and white video back then, didn’t they?”

    Related:
    Lack Of Grey Matter, Part 2
    Lack Of Grey Matter

    A Model Perspective

    | Devon, UK |

    (A customer is visiting South Devon where there are a lot of tourist attractions including a very popular model village. He has just been on a tour and is now looking out over the town from a hillside.)

    Customer: “You have a good view here. Is that the Model Village over there?”

    Me: “No, sir. That is an example of perspective.”

    Gives New Meaning To Family Tree

    | Pennsylvania, USA |

    (I work as an educator in a native American village. I am with a group of pre-schoolers.)

    Me: “Believe it or not, the Lenape used to tie their babies to a board and hang them in a tree so the foxes wouldn’t get them!”

    Child 1: “Do they still do that?”

    Me: “No, they live just like we do today and don’t need to.”

    Child 2: “That’s not true. My mommy and daddy tie me to trees when they get mad.”

    The Holy Ghost

    | Hyde Park, London, UK | Religion

    Tourist: “Excuse me, do you know why are there so many police and ambulances about?”

    Me: “It’s for the Pope’s visit. He’s preaching in the Cathedral and then there’s a procession.”

    Tourist: “But didn’t the Pope die years ago?”

    The Great Emancipator Died Sooner Than Later

    | Washington, DC, USA | Family & Kids

    (I work at a historic site from the American Civil War. I am talking to a 7-year old child.)

    Small Child: “Who shot President Lincoln?”

    Me: “He was shot by a Southern sympathizer named John Wilkes Booth.”

    Small Child: “But why did he want to kill the president?”

    Me: “Well, the North and the South were at war, and Booth thought that if he killed President Lincoln, it might help the South win.”

    Small Child: “Oh…so were you here when it happened?”


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