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    The Surer They Are, The Stupider They Get

    , | Lagoon, UT, USA |

    (I work in a burger stand)

    Me: “Welcome, what can I get for you?”

    Lady: “I would like a cheeseburger with no cheese.”

    Me: “Umm…would you just like a hamburger?”

    Lady: “No. I would like specifically a cheeseburger with no cheese.”

    Me: “Are you sure? A cheeseburger is 25 cents more than a hamburger.”

    Lady: “Yes, I’m sure.”

    There’s Dumb, And Then There’s Scary Dumb

    , | Tampa, FL | Top

    Me: “Can I help you?”

    Woman: “Yes, I’d like to buy tickets for Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party.”

    Me: “Wonderful, when will you be attending?”

    Woman: “Tonight.”

    Me: “I’m so sorry, ma’am, we actually have sold out for tonight’s event.”

    Woman: “Oh, okay, I’ll just get tickets when I get to the park.”

    Me: “No, ma’am, I’m sorry, we don’t have any tickets at all left. You won’t be able to purchase them at the park.”

    Woman: “Right, you’re just sold out of advance tickets, that’s okay, I’ll just get them there.”

    Me: “I’m so sorry ma’am, we are sold out of ALL tickets. That means there are NONE available when you get there.”

    Woman: “But I can still go, right? I just won’t have a ticket?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, you can’t attend Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party without a ticket, and we do not have any tickets available.”

    Woman: “Fine, I’ll get my tickets when I get to the park.”


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