Age Or Gender Gap

| Gloucestershire, UK | At The Checkout, Family & Kids, Uncategorized

(A woman and her daughter are standing by the cigarette counter where I am working.)

Child: “Mummy, can I have a chocolate bar?”

Mother: “Okay. Pick the one you want and give it to the man.”

(There is a long, tense pause as the child and I look at one another.)

Child: *in a very condescending tone* “Mummy. I think it’s a lady.”

Me: “She is correct.”

The Tower Of Babble

| New Zealand | At The Checkout, Language & Words, Uncategorized

(Note: I am of Asian descent.)

Me: “Good morning!” *starts scanning groceries*

Customer: “Ni hao!”

Me: “Oh, I’m not Chinese.”

Customer: “Konnichiwa!”

Me: “I’m not–”

Customer: “Shalom!”

Me: “Sir, that’s not even–”

Customer: “Namaste!”

*silence*

Customer: “I know so many languages! So many!

Curiosity Feeds The Cat

| Victoria, Australia | Pets & Animals, Uncategorized

Customer: “Can you help me please?”

Me: “Yes, of course, what can I do for you?”

Customer: “Well, I want to buy some food for my cat, but mine doesn’t look like the one on the packet. Can I still feed it to him?”

Me: “Yes sir, of course.”

Customer: “Wow, really? Thanks!”

From The Mouth Of Babes, Part 2

| Washington, USA | Family & Kids, Uncategorized

Me: “Can I help you?”

Child: “I don’t get it.”

Me: “What?”

Child: “Are you old or just simple?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Child: “Cause my mom said everyone who works at [supermarket] is either old or simple.”

(The mother comes running behind him, picks him up, and runs off.)

Related:
From The Mouth Of Babes

Early Bird-Brained

| New Zealand | Top

(I am at work doing a before-opening clean of the trolley handles and checkout counters.)

Customer: “Excuse me, I’d like to buy these now please.”

Me: “Um, ma’am, I’m not a checkout operator.”

Customer: “Yes, but I’m here now and I’m running late, so can you just run these through the scanner for me?”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s five thirty. There are no checkout operators as we don’t open for another hour and a half.”

Customer: “Oh, I was wondering why there wasn’t anyone in the Deli, but that’s okay because I went back behind the counter and got the ham out the freezer.”

Me: “Ma’am, you’re not allowed to do that. How did you get in? The doors are locked until the security guard gets here.”

Customer: “Oh, I broke the window because I thought your door wasn’t working. Can you run these through for me now?”

Related:
Bird Brained
Bird Brained, Part 2
Bird Brained, Part 3
Bird Brained, Part 4
Bird Brained, Part 5

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