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    Dealing With A Spot Of Bother

    | Bristol, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

    (I work in a small store, and I find that customers talk to the staff more than anywhere I’ve worked. I currently have a fairly large spot in the middle of my forehead, which I am too lazy to cover with makeup but no one has commented on all night. An hour before we close, this happens:)

    Customer: “You look like you’ve been shot in the head!”

    Me: “Mhm…”

    Customer: “I’d know; I used to be a police officer.”

    Me: *nods, clearly uncomfortable as he’s speaking quite loudly in a small store*

    Customer: “Well, you ladies have a nice night now! Look after that bullet wound!” *laughs and leaves*

    Coworker: *to me* “…I hope he gets shot in the head.”

    Can’t Talk Your Way Out Of That One

    | Methuen, MA, USA | Bizarre, Health & Body

    (I’m scanning a customer’s groceries. Everything is going normally, and then she says out of the blue:)

    Customer: “Do you like my shirt?”

    (It’s a shirt for a cancer awareness walk.)

    Me: “Sure, it’s a nice shirt.”

    Customer: “Yeah. I had cancer, you know.”

    Me: “Oh, no! But you’re cancer-free now, I hope?”

    Customer: “Yes. But I don’t like to talk about it.”

    Me: “…Have a nice day.”

    A Sweet Gesture

    | Aalst, Belgium | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers

    (I am at the register. An older lady, visibly shaken up, approaches me.)

    Me: “Can I help you, ma’am?”

    Lady: “Yes, about half an hour ago, I bought my groceries here.” *shows me her receipt* “But when I was in the aisle, one of my bags broke. And to have my hands free I put this bar of chocolate in the pocket of my coat. I didn’t notice it until a few minutes ago.”

    Me: “So you’ve come back… to pay for it?”

    Lady: “Yes, I feel awful about it.”

    Me: “Wow…  Just, wow. You are the first person to do that since I have worked here. I didn’t know people would do that!”

    (I finished her transaction. If it hadn’t been company policy to not give things away, I would have given the chocolate to her for free. Thanks, lady, for showing there are decent, albeit unusual, people out there.)

    Not Very Closed-Minded, Part 13

    | Clifton, NJ, USA | Crazy Requests

    (The supermarket where I work is going out of business. There are large signs placed EVERYWHERE stating this. It is the last week of operations where the discounts range from 40% to 80% off. Needless to say the shelves are a little bare and there is not much variety. As I am working at marking discounted prices on items a customer continually approaches me to ask questions.)

    Customer: “Why don’t you have [specific flavor of ice cream] I want?”

    Me: “Because the store is closing.”

    Customer: *yelling* “That is unacceptable! I am going to report you to the corporate office!”

    (I can’t help but burst into laughter.)

    Customer: “What’s so funny?”

    Me: *between laughs* “Lady, the company is going out of business. Do you REALLY think Corporate gives a s***?”

    Not Very Closed Minded, Part 12
    Not Very Closed Minded, Part 11
    Not Very Closed Minded, Part 10

    Trouble Brewing, Part 7

    , | VT, USA | Food & Drink

    Customer: “Do you have iced tea?”

    Me: “Um, yes, we have lots of kinds of iced tea. Are you looking for a single-serving bottle or for a big bottle?”

    Customer: “What? No, I just want iced tea.”

    Me: “Um, okay, sure. There are a lot of coolers around the store that hold chilled drinks. You can find some at the other end of this aisle here, or at the other end of this one here, facing the meat and seafood. Or there are big bottles held at room temperature in the juice aisle, or—”

    Customer: “No, no. What? I just want some iced tea! Some iced tea, just like you have the iced coffee!” *he gestures to some large self-service carafes which hold strong coffee to be poured over cups of ice*

    Me: “Oh, you mean you want it to be brewed in-house? I’m sorry; we don’t sell it that way here.”

    Customer: “No, I don’t want it brewed in-house. What?”

    Me: “Okay, so you want a bottle of iced tea?”

    Customer: “No! I just want to buy a cup of iced tea!”

    Me: “Uh, okay… I’m sorry, I’m really trying to understand you, but I’m just not sure what you’re asking for. Sometimes a store sells iced tea in bottles, and they’re packaged somewhere else and then we just sell them. Sometimes a store sells iced tea that they’ve brewed themselves on the premises. We only sell it in bottles that come from outside companies. There’s a cafe down the block that might sell it homemade, if that’s what you want. I can give you direc—”

    Customer: “I just find it incredible that you really don’t sell just plain iced tea.”

    Me: “Sir, I didn’t say that. We have plenty of iced tea.”

    Customer: “I want you to stop looking at me like I’m insane for trying to get some plain iced tea!”

    Me: “I’m sorry! I’m just trying to figure out how else a store could possibly sell iced tea. You don’t want it brewed elsewhere and bottled and shipped here, and you don’t want it to be brewed here in the store—”

    (At this point my customer turned around and walked away, still looking completely pissed off.)

    Trouble Brewing, Part 6
    Trouble Brewing, Part 5
    Trouble Brewing, Part 4

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