Mothers Can Be A Daily Grind

| New Hampshire, USA | Family & Kids, Uncategorized

(We were giving away free packages of instant coffee for promotional reasons. Each package was about the size of a sugar packet.)

Customer: "What’s that?"

Me: "It’s a free package of instant coffee. Would you like one?"

Customer: "How does it work?"

Me: "Just put it in a cup, and mix it with water."

Customer: "Is the cup, and water inside the package?"

Customer’s Mother: "You’re a moron."

Maybe He’s A Werewolf

| Calgary, AB, Canada | Bizarre, Uncategorized

(I work in a shoe store, men’s department.)

Me: “Good morning, just let me know if you have any questions today.”

Customer: “Thank you. I am looking for shoes.”

Me: “Well, you are in the right store. What kind of shoes?”

Customer: “Shiny grey.”

Me: “You mean a silver shoe?”

Customer: “Exactly! But let’s just call it shiny grey.”

Should Have Paid Attention In School

| Illinois, USA | At The Checkout, Money, Uncategorized

(A customer places shoe boxes on the counter and stares at me.)

Me: “All set then?”

Customer: “Oh, yes. School.”

Me: *slightly confused* “Uh, yeah! Yeah I can’t believe school is starting already!”

Customer: *chuckles* “Heh… yeah. School.”

Me: *more puzzled* “Yeah, I know. So soon!”

Customer: “Where’s my 20% off?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am?”

Customer: “Your website said if that if I said the word school in your store I get 20% off my purchase.”

Me: “I don’t think you read correctly, ma’am. We don’t have any sort of sale like that going on.”

Customer: “It says that if I say school I get a discount!”

Me: “I think you were supposed to text school and get a coupon code sent to your phone.”

Customer: “Well, school. Now give me my 20%.”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, I just can’t do that. We’re not running that kind of sale.”

Customer: “Well you should fix the internet, then! This is ridiculous!”

A Bit Grey With Anatomy

| United Kingdom | Extra Stupid, Uncategorized

(We sometimes lose shoes and are stuck with one which we can’t sell. When this happens and it is a man’s shoe for the right foot, we sell them very cheaply to a war veteran who only has one leg. On this day, the veteran has just paid for one. There is a man behind him in the queue.)

Customer: “Why does he get those shoes so cheaply?”

Me: “Because he is only buying the right shoe, not a pair.”

Customer: “Why would he want just one?”

Me: “Because he only has one leg. He lost the other in combat.”

Customer: “Yeah, but even if he lost one leg, he’s still got two feet, right?”

Branded As Stupid

| St. Augustine, FL, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “There is a brand that they sell only in Europe. Do you have that brand?”

Me: “It’s a shoe brand?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “And they sell it only in Europe?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “Do you know where you are?”

Customer: “Yeah.”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, we just don’t have that brand.”

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