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    Selling Foot In Mouth Disease

    | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Bad Behavior

    Me: “Hello! How can I help you today?”

    Customer: “I’m looking for some shoes for work and I heard you had comfortable ones.”

    Me: “We certainly do. May I ask what your profession is?”

    Customer: “Oh I don’t have a profession right now. I just need something I can wear to work in retail until I get a real job.”

    Running A Mile With Another Man’s Shoes

    | KY, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Theme Of The Month, Top, Wild & Unruly

    (At the store I manage, we put sensors on expensive shoes. My sales manager comes up to inform me she has heard a customer popping one off of a shoe. I approach the customer.)

    Me: “Hello, how are you doing today? Do you need any assistance?”

    (I notice a sensor sitting next to him. I pick it up and hold it in my hand while assisting him. He picks up a shoe box, and starts to walk away.)

    Customer: “No, I’m good.”

    (He proceeds to look around the store while I follow him; I’m still holding the sensor. He puts the box he is carrying on a shelf, and starts to make his way out the door. I pick up the box to find it empty. He is walking down the sidewalk, so I run after him.)

    Me: “Sir, give me back those shoes!”

    Customer: “I don’t know what you’re talking about; you’re crazy!”

    (He proceeds to run across the parking lot, with me in hot pursuit.)

    Me: “Help! Help! Criminal! Criminal!”

    (I am a small, 5’ young woman, chasing a 6’ man in his 30s. I start to lose steam, and am losing him. Out of nowhere, a security guard runs past me. The customer does not notice the guard, but starts dropping shoes out of his pants one by one. Thinking I am lagging behind, he turns back to pick up the shoes. He notices the security guard, and starts to run again. A car pulls up and tries to hit the shoplifter. He doesn’t hit him, but slows the man enough to allow the security guard to catch up. They proceed to wrestle, and the security guard takes the customer down. In the end, the customer is arrested, and I get all the shoes back!)

    Kick Off Your Sunday Shoe Store

    | LA, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Musical Mayhem

    (I am out shopping with two of my cousins. They decide we need to look at shoes. The store is nearly empty and they have a local oldies station playing. ‘Footloose’ comes on as they’re browsing the shoes.)

    Me: “Ooh! Footloose! I love this song!”

    Cousin #1: “Just don’t—”

    (Before she can finish her sentence, I start dancing to the music. She and her sister hide their faces and walk off to look at shoes in another part of the store. The two employees, who had looked bored to tears, start laughing and clapping as I dance around the shoe fitting area. When the song ends, I plop down on one of the seats to catch my breath.)

    Cousin #2: “We can’t take you anywhere!”

    Employee #1: “Oh, she didn’t hurt anyone!”

    Employee #2: “In fact, she just made our day! Thank you!”

    Me: *grinning* “I work with the public, and I know the bad customers outweigh the good, so I figured I would brighten your day!”

    Handling Change Well

    | Cork, Ireland | Criminal/Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Money, Theme Of The Month

    (A well-dressed, middle-aged man comes up to me with a friendly smile.)

    Customer: “Excuse me, I’m sorry to be a bother. Could I possibly get change from you?”

    Me: “Okay, come up to the till. I’ll help you out.”

    Customer: “Thank you so much.”

    (He hands me three €20 note.)

    Customer: “If I could get a €50 note and a €10 note out of this, it’d be really helpful.”

    (I take the three €20 notes, and hand him back the change.)

    Customer: “Thanks. Sorry, but could I ask one more favor? Could I just get two €1 coins for this?”

    (He hands me a €2 coin. I am feeling slightly suspicious now. I turn back to the till, take out the two one-euro coins, and hand them to the man. He doesn’t move.)

    Me: “Is there something else?”

    Customer: “You never gave me the €50 note.”

    Me: “I’m pretty sure I did.”

    Customer: “No, you definitely didn’t.”

    Me: “Sir, I’m not giving you any more money. If you would like, you can come back during closing. If we’re €50 over the end of day report, I will be happy to rectify my mistake. However, I’m absolutely positive I did not make one.”

    Customer: “Are you, really? This is ridiculous. You did not give me the money!”

    Me: “I think I did.”

    Customer: “You couldn’t have made a mistake? How are you so sure?”

    Me: “Because the corner of the €50 note I gave you is sticking out of your sleeve.”

    (Turns out he had done it to all the other shops on the street, and successfully conned two.)

    Always Put Your Best Foot Forward

    | UK | Awesome Customers, Awesome Workers, Theme Of The Month

    (It is a few days after Christmas. I am a student but work in a shoe shop which is well known for measuring and fitting kids’ shoes. However, although we have measuring gauges in adult sizes, we rarely use them because adults tend to know what size they are.)

    Customer: “Hi, can you measure my feet?”

    Me: “Yep, no problem; one moment.”

    (I go to get the gauge and sit the customer down.)

    Me: “Okay, you’re coming up as a size six but very wide.”

    Customer: “That can’t be right! I haven’t ever been a size six! These trainers are a man’s size ten! I haven’t worn nice shoes since before my son was born; I’m too big for these!”

    Me: “Well, that’s what you’re coming up as. Obviously as you are so wide, it’s likely that you’ve gone up for the width rather than the length, so why don’t we look in the wide fitting range over here and see what we have?”

    Customer: “Okay…”

    (She is clearly skeptical, but I manage to find a size 7 extra wide which fits.)

    Me: “Okay, that’s a start! Normally, I would have to radio up to find a specific style, but I am going to go and ask my manager if I can go up to the stockroom myself and just pull anything I think you might like and could fit. Is that okay?”

    Customer: “That’d be brilliant.”

    (I bring down three styles in extra wide; the customer is astounded when I tell her that there could be more. I show her the second pair.)

    Customer: “Now these I like! They’re pretty, but they’ll work for my job interview too. I just can’t believe they fit!”

    Me: “Okay. Well, I’ll go and box them up and take them to the till for you. I hope you enjoy them and good luck for your interview!”

    Customer: “Thank you so much! What’s your name?”

    Me: “I’m [name]. And it was no problem!”

    (After she has paid, the customer finds me whilst I am tidying a sale rack.)

    Customer: “I was looking for your manager, but I couldn’t find one. Here, you helped me find the first pair of nice shoes I have had in years! I don’t know what your official policy on tips is but, this is for you.”

    (She hands me five pounds.)

    Me: *stunned* “Thank you very much!”

    (Later, I ask a manager and he says that tipping so rarely happens that there is no official policy and I can keep the five. I’d been having a pretty awful day, but knowing that I had helped that woman find something that meant so much to her made it, and the last few hours were so much easier!)

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