Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Your Connection Is Totally Forked
    (1,994 thumbs up)
  • November Theme Of The Month: I Don't Work Here!
    Submit your story today!

    Giving Closing Time The Boot

    | Edmonton, AB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month, Time

    (We close at 8 pm but we have a straggler in the store who was trying on pants at 8:30 pm. Our sign was off and my manager and I were dressed down ready to go home. The phone rings.)

    Me: “Good Evening, [Store Name]. [My Name] speaking. How can I help you?”

    Caller: “What time do you close?”

    Me: “8 pm.”

    Caller: “Oh, but its 8:30 and you’re still there?

    Me: “Yes, sir.”

    Caller: “So… can I come buy boots?”

    Me: *face in palm* “No, sir. We close at 8 pm. You will have to come by tomorrow.”

    Caller: “But you are still there. Are you doing your own work?”

    Me: “Yes.”

    Caller: “Okay. So can I come in?”

    Me: “Have a good night, sir…”

    Alarmingly Bad At Listening

    | FL, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid

    (I am ringing up a customer. The transaction goes smoothly until he is about to walk away with his purchases in his cart.)

    Me: “Oh, sir, you can’t take the cart out the doors. Our alarm will go off.”

    (The customer ignores me and keeps walking. Thankfully he turns around because his wife wanted to purchase another pair of shoes. Once that is done, I try again. Once again, he ignores me.)

    Me: “Sir, you can’t take the cart.”

    (The customer and his wife ignore me and continue to leave, until the security alarm goes off.)

    Customer: *pokes head back through the door* “Am I good?”

    Me: “No, you can’t take the cart.”

    Customer: *smiles and nods* “Okay.” *leaves with the cart*

    Me: “Well… okay, then.”

    This Family Business Is A Joke

    , | Calgary, AB, Canada | Bad Behavior, Funny Names, Theme Of The Month

    (I work at a well known shoe store. We wear tags bearing the name of the store, but not our names. A customer comes in and looks at my tag.)

    Customer: “So… your name’s Rockport?”

    Me: “Yep, it’s a family name. My dad started the business, and he wants me to learn it from the ground up.”

    Customer: “Really? That’s so admirable!”

    (I gesture to a few coworkers wearing the same name tag.)

    Me: “Yup, all the Rockport kids learn the business this way.”

    Customer: “All of you? Wow!”

    (I can’t quite believe she hasn’t caught on by this point, so I take pity.)

    Me: “What can I help you find…?”

    Going Gaga For Shoes

    , | ACT, Australia | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

    (A young woman comes bursting into the store, flustered. She runs around all the aisles, frantically, at least three times. I watch her and go to walk over to help her, but she beats me to it and runs straight up to me, panting, sweating, red-faced, and a look of stress in her face.)

    Customer: “DO YOU HAVE LADY GAGA’S SHOES?! I NEED THEM!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t even know where you could even buy Lady Gaga’s shoes to start with. We don’t sell them here though…”

    Customer: “UGH! Not good. Not good… I ABSOLUTELY NEED LADY GAGA’S SHOES RIGHT NOW!”

    (She then bolted out the door, as if she was running from a pack of lions. The other customers and I just stood there for a moment to take in what just happened.)

    The Other Shoe Never Dropped

    , | Calgary, AB, Canada | Extra Stupid, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m at work in a store that exclusively sells shoes. Sometimes when people get unspecific about what they want, I like to joke with them about it.)

    Me: “Hi there! Were you searching for anything in particular today?”

    Customer: “Shoes.”

    Me: *dead-pan* “Sorry, we’re out of those.”

    Customer: “WHAT?”

    (The customer looks seriously angry and tries to storm out before I chase her down and tell her that we do, in fact, have some shoes left.)

    Page 1/612345...Last