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    A Fraud Sandwich

    | USA | Crazy Requests, Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink

    Customer: “Hi. I’m here to order some food but first I have a little situation. I was hoping to talk to someone who could help me with it.”

    Me: “Okay, sure. What can I help you with?”

    Customer: “I was in here last week and I left three of my sandwiches here. I had already paid for them. I just accidentally left them in the store. I called and the woman said, I forget her name, but she said I could get them replaced.”

    Me: “All right, did you have your receipt?”

    Customer: “No, it was left in the bag that I left here.”

    Me: “Okay, so, you don’t remember who you spoke to? What day—”

    Customer: “No, I can’t recall her name. She just told me to come in and I could get my sandwiches.”

    Me: “Okay, what day did you come in?”

    Customer: “Oh, I don’t know. Some day last week.”

    Me: “Okay, last week? So… what day?”

    Customer: “I guess, I don’t know, I think it was Thursday. Probably Thursday.”

    (I get some more information including her name, that she was here around 4-5pm and that her order was over 40 dollars and paid for in cash.)

    Me: “All right. I’ll go ahead and check out this information and I’ll be right back.”

    (I check the manager schedule for last week to see who it may have been that she spoke to. It is the first week of December and it just so happens that Thursday the previous week was actually Thanksgiving, one of two days the entire year that we ever close.)

    Me: “So, ma’am, are you sure you came in on Thursday?”

    Customer: “Yeah, it had to have been Thursday. I’m pretty sure it was Thursday.”

    Me: “Okay well, we were actually closed last week on Thursday because it was Thanksgiving.”

    Customer: “Oh, well, I don’t really remember. I guess it was probably Friday.”

    Me: “All right, I’ll be right back.”

    (I check the schedule for Friday, and it turns out that two female managers had been in very early for Black Friday catering and had left well before 4pm. The only female manager who was in past 11am was me. I double check our guest checks and can find no orders for even close to 40 dollars that were paid in cash.)

    Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but it looks like there are no checks from Friday for a 40 dollar cash transaction and the only female manager here on Friday that you could have possibly talked to was me.”

    Customer: “Look, I don’t really remember what day it was. The manager I spoke to just told me to come in here and any manager would be able to get me my sandwiches.”

    Me: “All right, I’ll be right back again.”

    (One of the female managers is actually working and says she didn’t talk to this woman, so I call the last possible option and she confirms that she would have left a note about it and that she can’t remember any situation for three sandwiches by this customer’s name.)

    Me: “Well, ma’am, unfortunately there seems to be no information regarding your situation. Our procedure is to take the customer’s name and possibly phone number and leave a note of communication for other managers. I cannot find any notes and none of our female managers remember promising anyone by your name three sandwiches.”

    Customer: “I… I don’t understand.”

    Me: “The managers here are all instructed to follow a certain standard of procedures when dealing with promising customers free food. We take the customer’s name and leave a note for the other managers-”

    Customer: “So what are you telling me?”

    Me: “The procedure for dealing with this situation was not followed by whatever manager you may have spoken to. You can’t remember any details about your transaction and there is no evidence of it here in the store. Unfortunately, due to our policies, I will be unable to give you any sandwiches for free today.”

    (The woman had been becoming increasingly rude as our interactions had continued, culminating at this point to full-out head tilts and accusatory eyebrow raises.)

    Customer: “I definitely spoke to a manager and she said all I had to do was come here and talk to any manager and I would be able to be given my sandwiches that I had already paid for and left here.”

    Me: “Are you sure that you spoke to a manager, ma’am?”

    Customer: “Yes, I am.”

    Me: “Our managers all follow the same procedure for dealing with promising free food to customers. Somehow you managed to not be treated to the correct procedure and I will be unable to give you anything. You don’t remember the name of the manager and I can find no proof that your transaction ever existed. It would be in your best interest—”

    Customer: “I spoke to—”

    (Tired of being cut off, I continue to speak regardless of her interruption. She continues to try to interrupt me and I continue to speak over her.)

    Me: “It would be in your best interest to have as much information as possible regarding your situation if you truly intended to have your food replaced.”

    (The woman tries to act very holier-than-thou about the whole situation.)

    Customer: “I spoke to a manager and was promised my food replaced. I didn’t even ask for my money back. I just wanted to get my sandwiches that I had already fully paid for, and that is not my fault; that is YOUR fault. Now, I’m going to need to buy some jars of your hot peppers, and maybe you should go ahead and give me a discount.”

    Me: “You know what, ma’am—”

    Customer: “EXCUSE me, WHAT did you say?”

    Me: “Ma’am, you know what? I—”

    Customer: “WHAT.”

    (I pause and look at her. I figure the negligible price of a small jar of hot peppers that we give away for free on people’s sandwiches every day is worth quieting her.)

    Me: “I’m sorry that there was a miscommunication about your sandwiches and so I’m going to do you a favor and go ahead and give one of these jars to you for free.”

    Customer: “Good.”

    (After making me keep an associate late to watch the line so I could investigate this situation, inconveniencing other customers, and being remorseless and insulting about lying to somebody’s face, I hope that woman could get to sleep at night for ‘winning.’)

    Needs To Screen Her Comments

    | VA, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Technology

    (While standing in line at a sandwich shop, I overhear two women talking about one of them getting a new iPad.)

    Woman #1: “Yeah, I got a new iPad. I got black this time because I usually always go with white.”

    Woman #2: “Ew, white is so much better than black. You should have gotten the white.”

    Woman #1: “No, I wanted to match the case I got it.”

    Woman #2: “Don’t you have bad eyes?”

    Woman #1: “Yeah?”

    Woman #2: “Well you should have gotten the white, not the black. Now you are not going to be able to see on it.”

    Woman #1: “When I say it’s black, I was referring to the casing it’s in, not the screen.”

    Woman #2: “Oh!”

    With Great Bacon, Comes Great Responsibility, Part 12

    | Austin, TX, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

    Customer: “I’ll have the melt, please.”

    Me: “Okay! Would you like it toasted?”

    Customer: “No.”

    Me: “Would you like the bacon heated up?”

    Customer: “No, I don’t want bacon.”

    Me: “Oh, well, in that case I—”

    Customer: “Wait, how do you normally do the melt?”

    Me: “Well, since you don’t want bacon it’s—”

    Customer: *irritated* “No, no, no. Just forget about the bacon. How do you normally do it?”

    Me: “Um… put it in the toaster, but—”

    Customer: “Then put it in the toaster!”

    (Giving up on him listening to me, I comply.)

    Customer: *to next customer in line* “You’d think they don’t speak English here.”

    (The funny part is that I was trying to tell him that without bacon, his sandwich became a different kind, which was a dollar cheaper. Since he decided to be a jerk and cut me off, he probably told the cashier he’d gotten a melt, and paid for bacon that he never got!)

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    Taxing Taxing

    | MD, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Money

    (Two customers come in close to closing and order three milkshakes. One of my employees makes them, they pay and leave. Five minutes later they come back in.)

    Customer #1: “These shakes all taste funny. We tried all three. They’re all sour. We would like our money refunded.”

    Me: “I’m sorry about that. Give me just a moment.”

    (The card charges for the day don’t go through until we manually process them at the end of the night. Rather than giving them a refund for the charge amount, I find their exact order and comp off the shakes, making their order total $0.00 and removing their charge from having ever existed. I hand them a copy of the comped receipt.)

    Me: “Well, here you go. Sorry about the shakes. Have a good night.”

    Customer #1: “This is only for $8.70. We were charged $9.22.”

    Me: “It just says $8.70 because that’s the price for the shakes without tax, which was removed from the bill making the total bill zero. The tax isn’t displayed because no tax can be added to a total of zero.”

    Customer #2: “What, so I’m still being charged the tax!?”

    Me: “No… The total is zero. There is no charge being made at all to your card. The comp here says $8.70 because that is the original price for the shakes. ”

    Customer #2: “So you only refunded me $8.70, not $9.22.”

    Me: “The original price was removed entirely, making the total zero. As there is no total on your order now, there is no tax, so it’s not displayed. That’s just the way the receipt displays the information. The charge was reversed entirely. The total displayed is zero dollars and zero cents, which is the new total for your order.”

    (The customers, brows still furrowed, cautiously leave. Another moment later, customer #2 comes back in.)

    Customer #2: “Could I just have your name to reference in case of further incident?”

    Me: “Uh, sure, my name is [My Name].”

    (I include the incident in my end of the night communications to the next day’s managers in case anything comes up. I also work the next day, but am not the manager in charge. The next day, the manager comes to talk to me about mid-afternoon.)

    Manager: “Did you see your shake lady come in?”

    Me: “No. What? You mean the lady who thought I was charging her tax? From last night?”

    Manager: “Yeah, she actually came in! I had to explain to her that it wasn’t an actual refund but a reversal. She wasn’t getting it. I was like, it was a same day charge so we can just remove the charge from ever having happened rather than the hassle of doing a refund.”

    Me: “Yeah, I explained the same exact thing to her…”

    Manager: “She asked to speak to a manager, I should have gotten you!” *laughs*

    Me: “Oh, man, that would have been great. She drove all the way back up here over 52 cents.”

    Not So Sweet On The Sweet Chili

    | Australia | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

    (I work at a popular sub shop that makes sandwiches in front of customers to their liking. I am serving a woman and everything is fine until we get to the last few steps.)

    Me: “And would you like any sauce on that?”

    Customer: “Just a little bit of sweet chilli, please.”

    (I put one thin line of sweet chilli sauce on her sub.)

    Customer: “No, that’s too much!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, I can wipe some off or remake your sandwich for you if you like.”

    Customer: “No! You should have listened to me to begin with! When I ask for a little bit, you don’t drown the thing in sauce! I have a f***ing stomach ulcer. That’s why I can’t have much! Just forget about it!”

    (The customer storms off, muttering about how stupid I am and how I ruined her sandwich. I turn to my coworker, who witnessed the entire ordeal.)

    Me: “If she has a stomach ulcer maybe she shouldn’t order it to begin with!”

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