• Sew Inappropriate
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  • July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

    Canadian Hair-itage

    | Buffalo, NY, USA | Canada, Crazy Requests, Health & Body

    (I am getting my eyebrows threaded; while in the chair, I hear this exchange between an employee and another customer.)

    Customer: “How much to thread [facial area I didn’t see]?”

    Employee: “Ten dollars.”

    Customer: “But I don’t have that much hair there, can I get a discount?”

    Employee: “I’m sorry ma’am, it’s a flat rate; it’s ten dollars no matter how much hair you have.”

    Customer: “But I’m Canadian.”

    Employee: “…”

    Will Make It Up To You

    | Baltimore, MD, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body

    (I work for a popular makeup company that provides free ‘make-unders’ to clients for special occasions and events. I work in a full sized boutique. I have a client in for a homecoming look. She looks about 16. Her mother is there with her as well.)

    Client: “This is such a cool job. I’d love to work here.”

    Me: “Well, how old are you? You have to be 18 to work here.”

    Client: “Darn! I’m 17 for another few months. So close.”

    Mother: “Anyway, honey, you need to get a REAL job. You’re better than being a makeup counter girl.”

    (I proceed to drop the brush I’m using because I was so surprised that someone would say that right in front of my face. Her daughter looked mortified and gave me an apologetic look. I go behind the counter and get an application.)

    Me: “Here, fill out this application. I’ll put in a good word for you when you turn 18.”

    A Whole New State Of Understanding

    | PA, USA | Family & Kids, Geography

    (I’m currently having a conversation with a little girl, about kindergarten age, while I do her nails.)

    Little Girl: “You know, I’ve never been to the United States of America.”

    Me: “Wait, what?”

    Little Girl: “I’ve never been to the States. I wonder what it’s like there?”

    Me: “You live in the United States, hun.”

    Little Girl: “I do?”

    Me: “Yes! You sure do!”

    Little Girl: “Wow, I thought I lived in the city!”

    The Return: Uncut

    | Australia | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m getting my hair trimmed. Beside me is a four-year old boy, who’s just finishing his own haircut.)

    Boy: *scowling* “I don’t like my new haircut! Return it!”

    Mother: “… Return it?”

    Boy: “Yeah! You said that if I didn’t like my new haircut, that they could change it. Like when we changed my red shirt at [Clothing Store] for the green shirt! I want it back the way it was! Return it!”

    (Luckily my haircut was finished. I left while the mother was trying to explain to the increasingly unhappy little boy the difference between an exchange and a change, and why they couldn’t return his haircut.)

    An Irregular Appointment

    | UK | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

    (I work in a hair salon and take a phone call.)

    Me: “Hello. How may I help?”

    Customer: “I need an appointment with [Stylist] for a haircut.”

    Me: “Okay. When would you like to come in?”

    Customer: “Whenever works for [Stylist].”

    Me: “Okay. How about tomorrow at 3 pm?”

    Customer: “No. Can’t do that.”

    Me: “Friday at 10?”

    Customer: “No. Can’t do that.”

    (This goes on for a while.)

    Customer: “I can only do [specific date, a Saturday; our busiest time].”

    Me: “I’m afraid [Stylist] is fully booked that day. How about [Other Stylist]?”

    Customer: “I always see [Stylist].”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Customer: “They have nothing?”

    Me: “Sorry. They are fully booked.”

    Customer: “I have been seeing them for years.”

    Me: “Okay…”

    Customer: “Can you not move the other clients around?”

    Me: “Not really. How would you like if we moved you around for someone else?”

    Customer: “You wouldn’t do that. I’m a regular.”

    Me: “According to your record, you’ve been to see us three times. The clients booked in have been coming for the last six years.”

    Customer: *click*

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