November Theme Of The Month: Black Friday!

A Noteworthy Customer

| Brighton, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Money

(An eccentrically dressed man comes up to my till. I go to scan his items…)

Man: “No, wait! I can’t stand the beeping noise. It disturbs me. Hold on.”

(The man puts his fingers in his ears and nods to me. I scan through his items and he removes his fingers.)

Me: “That’ll be £4.49 please.”

(The man hands me a £10 note and I take a £5 note out of the till to give him as change.)

Man: “Could you check that, please?”

Me: “I’m sorry? What would you like me to check?”

Man: “The £5 note. I need to know it’s real.”

Me: “Um, okay.”

(I take out our note-checking pen and show him that the note is genuine.)

Man: “Thank you. You can’t be too careful can you? The banks like to keep some fake ones in circulation so that the public think there are crime rings everywhere. But there aren’t; it’s just the banks.”

Me: “Ah, I see… Well, you have a nice afternoon, sir.”

Man: “Thank you! And may all your wishes come true!”

Won’t Be Tricked Out Of His Treat

, | Chicago, IL, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(I am shopping with my parents at a home improvement store during the Halloween season. There is a skeleton on display that has candy on it.)

Dad: *reaches for candy*

Mom: “Don’t take that! It’s for display!”

Dad: “It looks like samples to me.”

(We head to the cash registers to make a purchase. A woman who appears to be the manager is with the cashier.)

Dad: “Just curious, is the candy on the Halloween display free?”

Manager: “I would expect…”

Dad: *to Mom* “Ha! I told you!”

Mom: “You gonna go back and get some?”

Dad: “Nah.”

Manager: “I’ll go get you some.”

(The manager actually goes and gets us some candy.)

Dad: “Thank you!”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 45

| Canada | At The Checkout, Money

Customer: “Hi. I’d like to return these pants.”

Me: “No problem. Was there anything wrong with them?”

Customer: “No, they were just the wrong size.”

Me: “Oh, would you like to exchange them for the correct size?”

Customer: “No, I don’t have time today.”

Me: “Okay.”

(I process her return. The lady paid credit, which means that it has to go back on the EXACT same card it was paid with.)

Me: “Okay, so you will get [amount] back onto your credit card. I just need to see it to make sure it matches.”

Customer: “Oh, could you tell me which one it was? I have a few.”

Me: “Sure, it was [last for digits of her credit card number].”

Customer: “Oh.” *pulls out card* “This one is cancelled, I thought I lost it.”

Me: *internal sigh* “Sorry, but I have to put it on the same card or I can give you a store credit.”

Customer: “But the card is DEACTIVATED! You cannot put it back on it! I DEMAND MY MONEY BACK!”

Me: “I know, but I have to give you a store credit…”

(She continues to fuss until my manager comes over and give me clearance to put it on her other card as long as her name matches, which it does.)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

(She then walks over to the table where the pants she just returned style was and proceeds to dig through the stack there. I go over and ask her if she wants a hand as she is destroying our neat pile. I grab her size out and hand it to her to go try on. She asks if she could leave her many bags of popcorn behind the cash desk since she did not want to hold them while she tried them on.)

Me: “Sure, no problem! Just ask for them when you are leaving!”

(At this point her children are running around the store and have dropped their whole bag of popcorn on our floor. My coworker starts to clean it up while I am cleaning up the pants tables. Her child then goes behind our cash desk to grab more popcorn.)

Me: “Hey! You can’t be behind there!”

Customer’s Kid: “This is my popcorn!”

Me: “You cannot be behind there. You need to get out! If you want your popcorn you need to ask your mom if I can get it for you! But you CANNOT be behind there!”

(The kid finally leaves as his mom comes out of the fitting room and goes to the cash desk with her new pair of pants.)

Me: “Oh, do you have the tags?” *note, all tags, price tag, description, size all have been ripped off. NOT how I gave it to her*

Customer: “No…”

Me: *sigh* “Fine, I’ll go grab another pair.” *grabs the top one from the pile*

Customer: “That’s not my size!”

Me: “I know, but I can look up your size in the computer as long as I have the pant style!”

Customer: “OKAY.”

Me: “All right, your total is [Total].” *cheaper then the pair she returned as these went on sale*

Customer: “Oh, could I have another pair?”

Me: *thinking because it’s cheaper she wants two* “Sure!” *gets a new pair* “Okay, so your price is [double].”

Customer: “What? I don’t want both. I just want this one!” *the new one*

Me: “They are the same pair.”

Customer: “Yes, but this one is cleaner!”

Me: “YOU ripped all the tags off in the fitting room!”

Customer: “I want the cleaner pair!”

Me: *just wanting to get rid of her by this point* “Fine! Your total is [total].”

Customer: “On credit.” *holds up same card she got the refund on*

Me: “Okay, insert when ready.” *customer’s card is declined* “Do you have money on the card?

Customer: “Yes, I just did a return.”

Me: “It takes up to three business days for a return on a credit card to process.”

Customer: “Okay, try my other card.”

(I try her other credit card, it declines too. Finally she decides to pay debit, and that declines too!!)

Customer: “Okay, I’ll just come back another day.”

(Needless to say we were all happy when she left.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 44
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 43
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 42

This Customer Is Not Worth A Dime

| FL, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I currently have a line at my register of a few people when two customers walk up to the side to ask a question. I’ve just finished with one person so I decided to quickly answer them before starting the next.)

Customer #1: “So, what is the price of this hat?”

(I flip the hat over and read the price printed on it.)

Me: “And just so you know, that’s actually part of the buy one get one half off, if you want to grab another hat.”

Customer #1: “Oh, okay!” *begins talking to her friend*

Me: *to the next person in line* “Hey, you ready to check out?”

Customer #2: “Oh, yeah, thanks.”

Customer #1: “Um, excuse me, you just cut in front of me in line, JUST SO YOU KNOW!” *storms off*

Customer #2: “Um… I’m sorry?”

Me: “Don’t worry about it; you were here first. I just answered a question for her really quick. Technically she skipped you.”

(About 10-15 minutes pass by and I get everyone else in line all dealt with when the girl comes back with two hats. I go through the process of asking for her email with she rolls her eyes at, then ring up her items and tell her the price.)

Customer #1: “Why is it that much?”

Me: “Well, it took [amount] off of this hat.”

Customer #1: “So the cheaper one was half off?”

Me: “…Yeah.”

Customer #1: “Why, that’s stupid. It should be the more expensive one. That’s LOGIC.”

(At this point, I’m annoyed. I’ve had a long day of frustrating customers and this girl has been rude from the start, so I couldn’t be bothered with being all smiles.)

Me: “Well, it’s a business and we’ve gotta make money.”

Customer #1: “Well, your business is stupid.”

Me: “…Okay. Do you still want to get both hats?”

Customer #1: “UGH. I guess.”

(I take her money and hand her her change, then SHE drops a dime on the floor trying to put it in her wallet.)

Customer #1: “Hey, open your register and give me a new dime!”

Me: “Uh… I can’t do that.”

Customer #1: “You have to. You can’t steal money from me!”

Me: “I can’t just take money out of the register. That would leave me short at the end of the night.”

Customer #1: “So? You need to give me another dime or you’re stealing from me.”

Me: “I can’t. I don’t owe you any more change. You dropped the dime.”

Customer #1: “I’M NEVER SHOPPING HERE AGAIN! THIS BUSINESS SUCKS!” *storms out of the store*

Manager: *who’s seen the whole thing* “We can only hope…”

Lost In Stupid Translation

| RTX, USA | Bigotry, Language & Words

(My husband and I have been fighting for the past few days, so when I come in for my shift, I’m not in the best of moods. There is a customer there, that is known for being difficult, harassing my coworker who is Hispanic and has a slight accent, but speaks perfect English.)

Customer: *speaking loud and slow* “I said I want to use my coupon for 10% off this item.”

Coworker: “Yes, ma’am, but I need to see the coupon. It has a code I need to type in.”

Customer: *still doing the loud and slow bit* “Coupon! Do you know what that is? Habla English?” *turns to her husband* “I have no idea why they even hire these illegals.”

Coworker: *angry and in tears* “I cannot give you the 10% without a coupon.”

Me: *doing the slow and loud bit to the customer* “She said you need the coupon here.” *makes a hand gesture of pointing to my hand* “She can’t do magic and make up a code that is on the piece of paper you call a coupon. Do you understand?”

Customer: *angrily* “Why are you talking to me like that? Yes, I understand.”

Me: “Are you sure? I was worried you didn’t understand what with talking the way you were.”

Customer: “I can’t understand her f****** language! She needs to learn to speak like us.”

Me: “I’m sorry, we don’t speak stupid here. It’s hard enough dealing with it.” *mimicking coworker while handing them their bags* “Thank you and have a nice day.”

(I expected to get written up, but the customer’s husband was laughing so hard she stalked out and left him there.)