Remained Unchanged Throughout

, | TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests

(While volunteering at the local Habitat for Humanity ReStore, I notice a middle-aged man walk up to the cashier and hand him a $20 bill. He is buying a $2 tire gauge, normally priced at twice that amount. I overhear the exchange.)

Cashier: “Excuse me, sir, do you have anything smaller?” *gestures at nearly empty money jar* “Our cash register isn’t working and I don’t think we have enough change in here to cash a 20.”

Customer: “But it’s legal tender.”

Cashier: “Yes, but we don’t have sufficient change.”

Customer: “It’s enough, isn’t it?”

(This goes on for about five minutes, with the cashier clearly attempting to keep his cool. Finally, he gives up.)

Cashier: “Here.”

(He reaches into his own wallet and pulls out $20 in fives and ones, takes $2 and gives the remaining $18 to the customer. The customer counts the money in his hands, then attempts to take the $2 sitting on the table.)

Cashier: “Hey, what are you doing?”

Customer: “You only gave me $18. I gave you a 20.”

Cashier: “Yes, but you want to buy this gauge, don’t you? It cost $2, so I took that out.”

Customer: “How do I know you didn’t short change me?”

(At this point, the cashier is about ready to explode. He grabs the cash and clearly counts the amount out. It amounts exactly to $20.)

Cashier: “There, you did get exact change. Now I will need $2 for the item.”

Customer: “I want a discount for the trouble you put me through.”

Cashier: *exasperated* “The item normally cost $4. You are getting it at half off. Now, is there anything else I can do for you?”

Customer: “No, that’s all. I ought to complain for the amount of time this took. Now I’m late.”

(He grabbed the tire gauge and left. I saw him, about two hours later, still wandering about the store.)

No ID, No Idea, Part 21

| PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Underaged

(The company that I work has recently switched to an ‘ID All’ policy. We gave all customers more than a two weeks’ notice in several ways (handouts, print outs at the bottom of the receipt, and warning every customer that makes a tobacco purchase that they will have to provide a photo ID starting on a certain date.) Despite our best to make the transition a smooth one, there are many customers, particularly regulars, who are not too happy with this. It has now been more than a month since the policy has been in place and people are still complaining. The gentleman appears to be in his late forties. I also am very petite and have always looked much younger than I am.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how are you doing today?”

Him: “Fine. Gimme [Brand cigarettes].”

Me: *grabbing that brand* “Okay, will that be all?”

Him: “Of course that’s all!”

Me: “All right, could I please see your ID?”

Him: “Are you f***ing kidding me? I’m old enough to be your grandfather!”

(I’m used to this type of reaction from our customers around his age and patiently start to explain our new policy. There are multiple signs all over the place stating that we ID all, as well as a stack of pamphlets right in front of him explaining the policy. All the while he is hurling abuse at me.)

Him: “How old do you have to be to buy cigarettes?”

Me: “PA requires you to be 18, though some states are 19.”

Him: “Well, I’m obviously older than that! Are you even old enough to be selling those things?”

Me: “There is no age requirement to sell tobacco products, although [Company] does require you to be 16 to work here. I am, however, 18, so I could legally purchase this with proper identification.”

Him: “There’s no f****** way you’re 18. When’s your birthdate?”

(I’ve had this question asked many times by customers who don’t believe I’m old enough to work at the store, so I usually just give it to them.)

Him: “Seriously? I thought you were like 12!”

Me: “So, you were willing to harass a 12 year old over a policy that I have no control over, which has been in effect for 6 weeks, and which had a further 2 weeks notice given to all customers, despite the fact that there is ample signage everywhere, including right next to [Brand cigarettes he wanted to purchase] which states that we require identification from EVERYONE, all the while causing a disturbance and holding up all of the customers in line behind you, simply because you refuse to show your ID? Which if I do not ask for and see I will lose my job and be required to pay a fine, and all of this because you’re offended that I asked for your ID? I know that you are over 18. Everyone here can clearly see that you are over 18! Now can I please just see your ID? If not I cannot and will not sell you the cigarettes, and I will help the person behind you, who has been patiently waiting the entire time you’ve been causing this ruckus!”

(He meekly hands over his ID and pay for his cigarettes without saying another word. The next person in line steps up as he’s putting his change back into his wallet. This customer has his ID already out.)

Customer #2: *pleasantly* “Hello there! How are you doing today?”

Me: “I’m doing pretty good; thanks for asking! What can I get for you today?”

Customer #2: “I would like two boxes of [Brand], please. And of course you can have my ID!”

(The first customer left as quickly as possible, but not before glaring at Customer #2.)

Related:
No ID, No Idea, Part 20
No ID, No Idea, Part 19
No ID, No Idea, Part 18

A Price For The Devil To Pay, Part 4

| CO, USA | Money, Religion, Technology

(I graduated with a PhD in mathematics from a major state university, but being from a fairly tight-knit family, when a storm takes out power to my grandfather’s family-owned business many family members go to help keep things running.)

Customer: “I’m so glad you’re open without power. I can finally get some shopping done.”

Me: “Yeah, I guess a power outage has its upsides, frees up some time.”

Customer: “No, no, no. I had a vision from God, and he told me that math and money were created by the devil…”

Me: “Umm… and the storm changes that how?”

Customer: “Well, without power, you don’t have those machines to add for you, so we can go back to good old fashioned charity, like God intended.”

Cousin: “You do realize we can do the math in our head, right? I mean this guy has a PhD in mathematics. I think he can add some prices up. Also, we have a backup generator; the registers should be up now.”

(The customer couldn’t get out of the store fast enough, brandishing a cross at the cash registers. Apparently, anyone who can do some mental addition is a servant of the devil; that or he wanted free stuff, your pick.)

Related:
A Price For The Devil To Pay, Part 3
A Price For The Devil To Pay, Part 2
A Price For The Devil To Pay

An Overly-Expectant Mother

| MD, USA | Criminal/Illegal, Family & Kids

(I work as a cashier in a popular clothing store. During the daytime we often have stay-at-home moms come in. In the area I work in, they are often very out of touch with reality. This one customer comes in alone with four small children in tow. I am the only cashier on the floor and I am about to do my regular check on the fitting room.)

Customer: “I need you to watch my kids while I go find a bathing suit.”

Me: “I cannot watch your children. You need to keep them with you.”

Customer: “Why not? You’re standing here anyway. Just watch them. I’ll be a minute.”

Me: “Ma’am, take your children with you. Leaving them alone is a liability that the store does not assume.”

Customer: “It’s just for a minute! Watch them for ONE minute!”

Me: “No. Keep your children with you or I will have to ask you to leave. You are not allowed to leave your children in the store unattended.”

Customer: “Oh, for crying out loud! Do any of you people understand what customer service is about? Where am I supposed to leave my children to shop?”

Me: “With a babysitter. There is also a drop-in daycare center two blocks away.”

Customer: *throws her hands up* “You’ve ruined my day. I guess moms aren’t allowed to shop!”

Me: “You can shop with your children. We allow children in the store if they’re with their parents.”

Customer: “Sometimes I need a break, too! Why is that so much to ask?!”

Me: “Well, that’s what the daycare centers are for. You could always try one of those.”

Customer: *storming away* “I guess I’m not allowed to shop now that I have kids!”

Return The Clock On The Clock

, | Canada | Bizarre

(I work at an engraving kiosk in a mall. Most of our products are engraved and not returnable.)

Customer: “What’s your return policy?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m not completely sure, but it’s stated on this sign right here.” *points to sign right in front of her*

Customer: “You don’t know your return policy? Do you even work here?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, I assure you I work here.”

Customer: “What does this mean, that engraved items can’t be returned? Why?”

Me: “…Once an item has been engraved with something like, ‘Love, Jim,’ it’s highly unlikely that anyone else would want that particular message.”

Customer: “Oh. I’ll buy this clock.”

Me: “Would you like anything engraved in it?”

Customer: “No.”

(Half an hour later, she was back to return the clock. I figure a. she was lonely and needed an object to accompany her through the mall, and b. she had a burning desire to test our return policy!)

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