Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Talking At-At Cross Purposes
    (1,362 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    Very Closed Minded

    | Bastrop, TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Holidays

    (The store that this takes place in is open 24/7 and is only closed for Christmas Day. One night, around 9:30, a customer calls the store and I answer it.)

    Me: ”[Location] [Store] customer service. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

    Customer: “Yes, I was calling to ask when you close tonight.”

    Me: “Customer service or the store?”

    Customer: “The store.”

    Me: “The store stays open 24 hours, ma’am.”

    Customer: “No, no, no. When does the store close?”

    Me: “It doesn’t. It stays open 24/7.”

    Customer: *sounding annoyed* “NO! I’m not asking when it is open I want to know when it CLOSES!”

    Me: “Ma’am, the next time we’ll close, excluding things beyond our control, will be 8 pm on Christmas Eve.”

    (After hearing that, the customer starts to yell into the phone.)

    Customer: “I DON’T GIVE A F*** WHEN IT CLOSES CHRISTMAS EVE! I WANT TO KNOW WHEN IT CLOSES TONIGHT!”

    Me: *wincing and pulling the headset from my ear as a pair of customers approach the counter* “Ma’am, please don’t yell. I am attempting to tell you that the store does not close.”

    Customer: “NO, YOU ARE JUST F****** TELLING WHEN IT F******* CLOSES ON GODD*** CHRISTMAS EVE, WHEN IT’S JUST APPROACHING EASTER!”

    Me: “Listen, ma’am, the store DOES NOT CLOSE UNTIL THEN!”

    Customer: “BULL-F******-S***! YOU’RE NOT TELLING ME YOU CLOSE BECAUSE YOU WANT ME TO WASTE MY FUCKING GAS GETTING OVER THERE ONLY TO HAVE YOU SHOO ME AWAY!”

    Me: “Listen, if you cannot understand that WE DO NOT, I REPEAT, NOT CLOSE, then I don’t know what to tell you.” *click*

    (I turn to the two customers who’ve been waiting at the counter.)

    Me: “Sorry about that. How can I help you?”

    In-Store Customer: *chuckling* “So, when do you close?”

    The High Point Of My Night

    , | Canada | At The Checkout, Criminal/Illegal, Food & Drink

    (I work as a cashier and am finally at the end of a long, frustrating split-shift. About 10 minutes to closing a group of guys in their early 20s come in and head straight for the confection aisle. They seem to be having a hard time deciding, and become panicked when my supervisor makes the closing announcement. They shove their candy, chips, and pop into the arms of one guy, and push him toward the cash. They leave the store, leaving their friend to pay. He places the items very slowly on the counter, blinking with confusion a number of times, swaying a little on his feet. I ring his items through.)

    Me: “That’s $14.59. How will you be paying?”

    Customer: “Uh… debit?”

    (He slowly pulls out his wallet and fumbles for his card. He finally places it in the debit machine, and then stares at it, unmoving. The machine times-out, so I reset it. He manages, with some difficulty to make it through the rest of the transaction. When I place his bag in front of him, he looks confused.)

    Customer: “Is this mine?”

    Me: “Yes, it is.”

    Customer: “These are the things I bought?”

    Me: “Uh… yes. Are you all right?”

    Customer: “Huh? Oh, yeah, don’t mind me, I’m just really fried.”

    (He pulls a 2 dollar coin out of his pocket and puts it on the counter.)

    Customer: “Don’t tell; my parents know the owner.”

    (He left, marveling at the automatic doors as he did. He has been back to the store a number of times, in the same state, and makes my day whenever he shows up.)

    So Closed But So Far

    | UT, USA | Bad Behavior

    (It’s a Sunday, when we close early at 5 pm. A couple walks in at 4:56, but since we can’t lock the doors until exactly 5 pm, there isn’t much we can do. I’ve been hovering near them for a few minutes, and it’s now 5:15.)

    Wife: “Excuse me, where is the toddler section?”

    Me: “Right here. However, we are getting ready to close, so let me know if I can help you find anything.”

    Wife: *absently* “Right, thanks.”

    (Another ten minutes later, and the couple is still shopping.)

    Husband: “Do you guys have any shorts for my daughter?”

    Me: *at this point pretty annoyed* “They are in this aisle here.”

    (The husband and wife wander over near another coworker of mine, and I see an opportunity.)

    Me: “Hey, [Coworker], what time is it?”

    Coworker: “About 5:30.”

    Me: *within earshot* “Guess we aren’t getting out of here anytime soon.”

    Wife: “Oh, are you guys closing soon?”

    Coworker: “We closed at 5:00.”

    Husband: “Ha ha! Guess we better get going, huh?”

    Obama Drama

    | Durham, NC, USA | Bigotry, Extra Stupid, Politics

    (I work in a high-end stationery boutique, whose clientele is generally upper middle class and upper class white women in their 40s to 60s – the sort of people whose spending habits didn’t really change when the economy nose dived. This customer appeared to be no different, and the address on the check she paid with confirmed as much.)

    Customer: “Where’s your clearance section?”

    Me: “We actually don’t have clearance sales, outside of our semi-annual sales after Christmas and Father’s Day.”

    Customer: “So everything in here is full-priced?”

    Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

    Customer: *sighs loudly* “Fine, I’ll pay full-price. But I really need to be saving every penny, with that black man as president.”

    Being A Good Person Is Doctor’s Orders

    | Australia | Geeks Rule, Movies & TV, Top

    (One of our national TV broadcasters has a chain of stores that sell DVDs and other merchandise for the shows on their channel. I am waiting in the store in line behind an older customer.)

    Customer: “… but I don’t understand why your shop is full of this Doctor Who rubbish! It’s a waste of space! You should be selling products for good, wholesome educational shows, not this science-fiction crap! It doesn’t teach kids anything! I bet that stuff doesn’t even sell!”

    Manager: “With all due respect, ma’am, Doctor Who is one of our network’s highest-rating and most popular dramas, and while it is primarily aimed at an older audience it meets the Australian Board of Classification’s definition of a family show. Furthermore, you don’t have to watch it or purchase the merchandise if you don’t agree with it.”

    Customer: “It’s not the most popular show! Nobody even watches it! I bet the girl behind me has never even heard of it!”

    (She turns to look at me and realises I’m wearing a TARDIS T-shirt holding several pieces of ‘Doctor Who’ merchandise. Behind me in line is a mother with her five- and eight-year-old sons, buying a ‘Doctor Who’ backpack for the older one. The customer realises her argument isn’t going to work and decides to start attacking the mother.)

    Customer: “You shouldn’t let him watch that science-fiction crap! It doesn’t teach them anything!”

    (Normally I would keep my mouth shut in this situation and let the manager handle it, but I was getting so fed up that I decided to speak up.)

    Me: “Excuse me, but Doctor Who is an extremely deep and educational show with a large cult following, that teaches lessons that go far beyond the schoolyard.” *I begin to recite a speech given by a character on the show* “The Doctor taught me that you don’t just give up. You don’t just let things happen. You make a stand. You say no. You have the guts to do what’s right when everyone else just runs away.”

    (Taken aback, the customer shut her mouth, quickly pays for her things, and leaves.)

    Five-Year-Old Behind Me: “Mummy, I change my mind! I want to be like her when I grow up!”

    Page 6/409First...45678...Last