Featured Story:
  • A Caffeinated Christmas Miracle
    (2,999 thumbs up)
  • I Didn’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here

    | Langley, BC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Theme Of The Month

    (I’m just shopping, when another customer comes by to ask me a question.)

    Customer: “Hey, how much is this?”

    Me: “I don’t know.”

    Customer: “You don’t know?! You work here, don’t you?!”

    Me: “No, I don’t work here.”

    Customer: *muttering* “God-d*** it, no one f****** works here. Can’t find any god-d*** help anywhere.”

    (The customer walks away, and I figure that is the end of that. Fast-forward a few months later: I need a job, and I just so happen to end up working for this very same store. On my first week I am feeling rather chipper and enthusiastic about helping customers.)

    Me: “Hello, sir, is there anything I can help you with today?”

    Customer: “I thought you didn’t work here! Were you being a lazy s*** back then?!”

    (Yep. Same customer.)

    Related:
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 16
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 15
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 14

    Loading Up Goodwill

    | Netanya, Israel | Home Improvement, Theme Of The Month

    (I am a customer at a popular Swedish cheap furniture mega-chain. On this evening I have just finished exchanging a disassembled table I mistakenly bought for the model I wanted. While I am loading the new box into my car, an older lady asks me to help with her new furniture.)

    Customer #1: “Excuse me, can you help me load this into my car?”

    Me: “But of course!”

    (As I load the woman’s furniture into her vehicle, a middle-aged man nearby sees me doing that and assumes that it is my job.)

    Customer #2: “When you’re done there, can you come help me?”

    Me: “Um, I don’t actually work here, but sure.”

    Customer #2: “Oh, you don’t? I’m sorry.”

    Me: “It’s no problem, I’ll help anyway.”

    (I help the man load his car, and he hands me a coin.)

    Customer #2: “Well here, take this for your trouble.”

    (I got a tip of 5 shekels – about $1.3 – without even working there.)

    An Eye-Catching Lesson

    | USA | Bad Behavior, Health & Body

    (I was born with congenital glaucoma, a condition that causes blindness if left untreated. As such, I went through several surgeries as a child and have mostly corrected vision with glasses, although one eye is still a little damaged. Because of these surgeries, my eyes are extremely unique-looking and sometimes startle people – some of them do make comments, but they’re mostly harmless and more curious than anything else. I’ve lived with this disease all my life, so I’m very open and frequently joke about it, but I still get very sensitive when people try to put me on the spot or harass me about it. On this particular day, a customer comes up and places a box of shoes on my register.)

    Me: “Good morning, sir. How are you today?”

    Customer: “Just fine. And yourself?”

    Me: “Doing great.”

    (It’s company policy to check shoe sizes and styles to make sure the customer leaves with a matching pair. Because of my condition, I’m extremely near-sighted without my glasses, which is perfect for reading the small tags on shoes.)

    Me: *takes off glasses and begins checking shoes*

    Customer: *laughs* “You either eat more carrots or put your glasses back on.”

    (Normally, I’m fine with joking about my eyesight, but I get very sensitive when people make fun of it.)

    Me: *continues checking shoes* “Sir, glaucoma chose me, not the other way around.”

    Customer: “Oh…”

    (I looked up in time to see the blood drain from the man’s face and his expression turn sheepish. He apologized profusely, which I accepted, and left quietly. I smiled on the inside, knowing that I’ve taught someone a small lesson about judging someone with glasses.)

    Expecting A High Level Of Service

    | Toronto, ON, Canada | Bizarre, Health & Body

    (I work at a large department store. I am working the closing shift in the men’s clothing department one night. Two young adults come over to look at the underwear, and they reek of marijuana. As I get closer to them, they stop me to ask me a question.)

    Customer #1: “Do you work here?”

    Me: *pleasantly* “Yes, I do. How can I—”

    Customer #1: “Woah. You act like you don’t even wanna deal with us.”

    Customer #2: “Yeah. S***…”

    Me: “I’m sorry… What can I help you w—”

    Customer #2: “Nah, nah, never mind.”

    Customer #1: “Yeah, you already treats bad, as a… customer.”

    Customer #2: “I won’t come back.”

    (They leave, and I am left to ponder what I could have possibly done. Later, I told my supervisor.)

    Supervisor: *laughing* “What? What was their problem?”

    Me: “High as kites.”

    Supervisor: “Ah. Of course. Say no more.”

    Next Door Chore

    | Edmonton, AB, Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

    Customer: “Hi, I bought these tweezers but the light doesn’t work. I want a refund.”

    Me: “Sure, do you have your receipt?

    Customer: *hands me a [Grocery Store] receipt*

    Me: “Oh, looks like you bought this at [Grocery Store].”

    Customer: “So?”

    Me: “This isn’t [Grocery Store]. That’s next door.”

    Customer: *angry* “Well, NOW what do I do?!”

    Me: “… Go next door and get a refund?”

    Customer: “Well! This is highly inconvenient!”

    Page 6/425First...45678...Last