A group of three people, one of whom is using a walker, enters the foyer area of the warehouse here I work. It is about -4°C/25°F plus windchill coming in through the doors. After about twenty minutes, the gentleman in the group approaches me.

Gentleman: “We are waiting for our friend who has the card, but can we come inside? My aunt is feeling really cold.”

Me: “Oh, definitely! Tell her to sit right here.” *Points to a spot* “It’s the warmest spot at the entrance.”

With many thanks, they enter and stay put about six feet behind me. In the almost forty-five minutes they wait for their friend, they overhear me, multiple times, asking people for their membership cards.

At about the half-hour mark, I ask one “lady” for her card. I won’t repeat her response because I like to keep things family-friendly. I do not react or comment, as I have been called worse. From behind me, I hear:

Gentleman: *Loudly* “Well, ain’t she special!”

The “lady” starts swearing at him.

Gentleman: *To me* “Do you get that a lot?”

Me: “Unfortunately, yes. But all I can do is ask if they have their card.”

Gentleman: “Well, that’s not right!”

Me: “Sir, you can say that. I can’t.”

We repeat the request and response with a few more members. The gentleman has various retorts.

Gentleman: “D***! Even I know the rules, and I ain’t even a member.”

Gentleman: “Too cool to pull plastic!”

Gentleman: “Yooo! Are you deaf?”

By the time their friend showed up, this group, especially the gentleman, called out at least ten people for ignoring quite publicly-known policy for the membership-only store!

They made my normally miserable Saturday entrance shift MUCH more enjoyable! They called out the members for behaviour that I cannot — at least, not if I want to keep my job.

I work in a retail store that sells mostly clothing so, naturally, we have multiple fitting rooms. A couple of weeks ago, we closed our smallest fitting room to expand our online pickup storage area. This fitting room had three stalls and was really barely used. It also has a maintenance closet in it already, so it made the most sense to get rid of.

There is now a big door with both an electronic padlock and a sign stating that is for associates only. I go to the now-storage room to store some fixtures I had broken down and find two ladies standing outside it.

Customer: *Demanding* “Let us in!”

Me: “Ma’am, this is no longer a fitting room and is for employees only.”

This conversation goes on for a couple of minutes; they don’t understand what I mean when I say that it’s no longer a fitting room. I’m standing there trying to think how else I can word, “No, you can’t go in because it isn’t a fitting room; it has a sign and lock and it’s pretty d*** obvious.”

Eventually, it clicks.

Customer: “Well, where is the fitting room?”

Me: “The big women’s fitting room is still open in the middle of the women’s department.”

Customer: “It’s inconvenient for us to go to that fitting room!”

That is the bigger and better fitting room in the middle of the department, versus this old one which is tiny and shoved in a corner. Seriously, how else do you explain something that is labeled as “employees only”? Do you want to get into our break room and stockroom, too?

I have recently purchased a rather expensive Wi-Fi router from a national retailer. After setting it up and using it for a week or so, I realize that it doesn’t have the range I want, and I’ll need to exchange it for a more expensive model. I pack it back up — I have all the original packaging, it’s in excellent condition, and the cords were never even unwrapped — and place it in the trunk of my car to return. Unfortunately, life interferes; it’s nearly two weeks later that I finally make it into the store. I’m now just over thirty days from the date of purchase; their return policy is fifteen days.

Me: “Hello, I forget the exact date I purchased this, but I know I’m outside of policy. Would it be possible to just return it for store credit and get the model I need?”

The returns employee doesn’t really look at the box but is rather nice. He pulls up my information and gets a concerned look on his face.

Employee #1: “Sir, this is well outside our return policy, I’m not sure what we can do for you. I’ll have to go talk to my manager and see.”

This is a current item, in perfect packaging, and I started by asking for store credit, implying I want/intend to spend more money at the store.

Me: “Okay, that’s great. Please go check!”

The returns employee disappears into the back and is gone an extended time. When he returns, he has a very grave face on. The “manager” has determined that the store will do nothing. Period. They don’t care about the condition of the item, or that I’ve asked for store credit. I even offer to pay a restocking fee. If this was a discontinued item, or in bad shape, maybe I could understand, but this just seems ridiculous. I’m forced to leave the store with this router under my arm and no real plan on what to do next.

The next day, I check and see that there’s another of this chain’s stores about fifteen minutes off my normal route to work, about forty-five minutes from the first store. Determined to try again, I take my router into this store and go to the returns desk.

Me: “Hey, how are you? I’m just going to warn you that I’m not going to be a great customer today. I don’t have my original receipt, but it’s in your system under my phone number, and I’m well outside policy to return this item. However, I’m just trying to upgrade this to a better, more expensive model, so store credit would be fine. Can you help?”

Employee #2: “Well, once you said the first part, I was going to see if store credit was okay with you, but then you offered to take it on your own, so I think we’re good there. Let me take a look at the box… Yeah, this is in great shape. Can I look up your receipt quickly?”

There is some banter back and forth while he looks up the receipt.

Employee #2: “Yeah, this won’t be a problem. Let me call my manager up for the approval!”

I am a little disbelieving that it is this simple this time.

Me: “Wow, that’s great! I was expecting to have to beg or something. Thanks so much!”

Employee #2: “Sir, you had everything in order, have been very nice this whole time, and are asking for something completely within our power to do. I’d have to be a real jacka** to have said no!”

Yes, he said that, verbatim. It was just so perfect, I wish I could have recorded it to go back to the first store and play back to the first employee and manager that I’d dealt with. The rest of the transaction went fine, I bought the additional equipment that I needed, and I turned in a glowing review of the employee that eventually helped me out.

I am a female employee at a place that has single-person bathrooms — one for men, one for women. A male customer approaches me.

Customer: “Do I need a key for the bathroom?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “But the door is locked.”

Me: “Oh, then that means someone is already in the restroom and they locked the door.”

Customer: “Can you unlock it for me?

Me: “No, there is already someone in there using the restroom.”

Customer: “But I need to go in there! Can’t you unlock it for me?”

Me: “No. No, I can’t. But I am sure that when the other person is done, they will leave, and you can go in.”

I just walked away.

Recently, we have been receiving a bunch of scam calls at my work. I knew it was only a matter of time before I got one. We are on the opposite side of the country from the headquarters, and they are three hours later than us. Also, they are never in the building on weekends. This call takes place on a Sunday evening.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How can I help you?”

Scammer: “I need to talk to a manager.”

Me: “I’m the supervisor on duty. How can I help you?”

Scammer: “This is [Scammer] from corporate. We are seeing a high number of gift card sales just going through your Point-Of-Sale system. We believe you have been infected with malware.”

Me: “Sorry, but I know you’re not from corporate. You’re gonna have to try again later. Good effort, though.”

I think I was mostly baffled that they thought somebody would believe there was anybody in our corporate office at 11:00 pm on a Sunday!