Doesn’t Fit Well With Me

| Grandville, MI, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(My mom knows the coupon troubles I have with other customers, and as a result, knows our coupon policies well. She was shopping during the Black Friday weekend when this happened.)

Customer In Front Of My Mother: “Have you heard about the $10 off coupon?

Mother: “Yes, but I don’t have it with me. It’s no big deal.”

Customer In Front Of My Mother: “Neither do I, but if you throw a big enough fit, the cashier will just give it to you!”

Refunder Blunder, Part 13

| Hampshire, England, UK | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid

(I work in a clothes shop. Our returns policy is printed on the back of our receipt: 28 days for full price or 7 days if the item is sale. If over that amount of time, the item may be exchanged if it is unworn. A customer comes in with an item to return. I notice a problem.)

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’ll have to either exchange this or put it on a gift card, as you’ve gone over the seven days.”

Customer: *patronisingly* “Sweetie, there is a month for returns.”

Me: “28 days technically, but yes, there is usually an extended time for full price items. However this is sale. There are only 7 days for that.”

Customer: “No one told me!”

Me: “Well, I can’t say either way as this top wasn’t bought from our store, but I can say it is written in the back.” *I show her*

Customer: *scathingly* “Like anyone reads them!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but it is written down for you to read.”

(She starts creating a scene, saying how the customer is always right and how useless I am. Usually, when a customer does this they get what they want, so i check her receipt to see if she is in date for the full price return.)

Me: “Erm, excuse me?”

Customer: “What?!”

Me: “This was bought in early December. It’s now February. You’ve had this item for two months now, so even if it was full price, you wouldn’t be able to get a full refund.”

Customer: “Uh… really?”

Me: “Yep, see?” *I show her the receipt* “You bought it the 2nd December and it’s now the 6th February.”

(There is a pause.)

Me: “So… exchange or gift card?”

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 12
Refunder Blunder, Part 11
Refunder Blunder, Part 10

His Hospitality Has Gone South

| Athens, GA, USA | Bad Behavior, Time

(I work at the jewelry counter in a large department store. I also carry a set of keys for the locked case of cologne which is adjacent to my counter. I’ve just served two customers at the cologne case, and then stepped back to the jewelry counter where a customer is waiting. The jewelry customer needs the battery in his watch replaced, a simple and quick task. I’ve just removed the back from the watch when an angry customer approaches the counter.)

Angry Customer: “Hey! Can’t I get some help at the cologne cabinet?”

Me: “Certainly, sir. I’ll be over in just one minute.”

Angry Customer: “I haven’t got one minute! I’ve got a bus to catch!”

(I look at the watch I’m working on. We carry the battery, and it truly will take only one minute to change the battery, replace the back, and ring that customer up.)

Angry Customer: “Come on, man! I don’t have time for this! Don’t you people know about Southern hospitality? I’m a customer!”

Me: “Yes, sir. This gentleman I’m waiting on is also a customer, and he was here ahead of you.”

(Angry Customer begins to mutter loudly and in a negative tone about our store and our employees. Other customers are turning their heads to see what the fuss is about. I look over at the gentleman whose watch I’m working on and address him.)

Me: “Sir, this man is apparently in a hurry. Would you mind if I stepped away for a second so I can get him his item and get him out of here.

Watch Customer: “That’s fine. I don’t mind.”

(I rush from behind the counter to the cologne case, fish out my keys, and open the lock.)

Me: *quickly* “Okay, sir, what can I get for you?”

Angry Customer: “Whoa, slow down there.”

Me: “Slow down? You said you were in a rush and couldn’t wait one minute.”

Angry Customer: “Boy, you just don’t know when to shut up, do you?”

Me: “Do you need something from this case?”

(He takes his time deciding between a couple of different bottles. We generally bring the cologne to the jewelry register to be rung up, but since I do not want to deal with him any further, and the item he’s selected is not expensive, I hand him the bottle and lock the case.)

Me: “Have a nice day!”

(I returned to the jewelry counter and quickly finished the gentleman’s watch. Twenty minutes later, I heard a commotion at the front end and looked up to see Angry Customer being escorted out of the store by security. Apparently, after finishing with me he’d yelled at another customer in line ahead of him and insulted the national origin of a cashier. When our store management informed him that he was being barred from our premises, he vowed to call our corporate office and complain about our lack of Southern hospitality.)

You’ll Pay For That Confusion

| USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

(I’m cashiering one night when a lady comes through the line with some small items, and the transaction proceeds smoothly. She already has her wallet out and is looking through her cards when I ring up the last item.)

Me: “All right, your total is [price].”

Customer: *panicked* “Wait, I have to pay?!”

Me: “Um… yes. If you’d like to use a card, you can go ahead and slide it in the pinpad…”

(She paid after that without any problem, and I was left confused for the rest of the night.)

Purchasing Is Its Own Reward

, | Seattle, WA, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “What can you do for me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, in regards to what specifically?”

Customer: “Well, I spend a lot of money with you guys and I don’t know if I should be talking to you or what but I want to know what you can do for me?”

Me: “Other than deliver great products at a great price quickly to your door?”

Customer: “I mean, is there a rewards program or something? I want something free for all my purchases.”

Me: “Sir, I see you are using a store Visa card with us. That does give you cash back on every purchase. I’m not exactly sure what it is you are asking, however. You’d like me to give you free products because you shop with us?”

Customer: “I guess I’m not talking to the right person.”

Me: “Sir, I don’t think there is a right person.”

Customer: “Just transfer me to someone else.”

Me: “Sure thing.”

(That was my first call of the day. No ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ or explanation. Just ‘what can you do for me?’ Wow.)

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