Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • De-Engineering Stereotypes
    (1,695 thumbs up)
  • September Theme Of The Month: Return Of The Geeks!
    Submit your story today!

    Hopefully, He Doesn’t Look As Stupid As He Sounds

    | Bakersfield, CA, USA |

    Me: “Hi, how can I help you sir?”

    Customer: “Do you guys sell pallets?”

    Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we don’t.”

    Customer: “… but there’s a whole bunch behind your store just sitting there.”

    Me: “Yes, but we reuse those. We don’t sell them.”

    Customer: “Well, is it illegal if I steal one of them?”

    Me: “Repeat what you just said to yourself.”

    Customer: *thinks for a second* “Oh.”

    It (Almost) Never Hurts To Check

    , | Baltimore, MD, USA | Top

    Customer: “Let me see that knife in the case.”

    Me: “Here ya go.”

    Customer: “I don’t think this knife is sharp enough.”

    Me: “Really? ”

    (The customer pulls the blade across his palm, slicing his hand open and spilling blood all over the floor.)

    Customer: “I guess it is.”

    Me: “Would you like some paper towels?”

    Oh Where, Oh Where Have My Role Models Gone

    | Parkersburg, WV, USA |

    Me: “How can I help you, ma’am?”

    Lady: “Yes, my daughter saw an ad for slip-n-slides in your store. I thought if you did have them, they’d be up here.”

    Me: “Um, no, we don’t have them.”

    Lady: “Ha! I knew it!”

    Me: “Yeah, we don’t have them here. Just small appliances up here.”

    Lady: “Yeah, my daughter is 12 years old, and she’s wrong. I can’t wait to tell her.”

    Me: “Heh… yeah.”

    Lady: “I can’t wait to rub it in her face. Mom’s right, and she’s wrong, FOR ONCE!”

    Me: *facepalm*

    Phrase Of The Day: Obesity Epidemic

    , | Montreal, QC, Canada |

    Customer: “Hi, do you work here?”

    Me: “Yeah, how can I help you?”

    Customer: “Do you sell baby mayonnaise?”

    Me: “… no. Seriously, I don’t think it even exists.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay…”

    Can You Say ‘Fire Sale’

    | Canada |

    (We had been having some issues with are fire alarm system and it happened to go off the night I was working. We are all standing outside and there are 5 firetrucks and firemen running everywhere. A man walks up to the doors and walks in.)

    Me: “Sir, you can not go inside just yet…”

    Customer: “I just need one thing. I will be real quick, just come in and ring me up!”

    Me: “Sir, can you not see that we have a possible fire situation? We are not allowed into the building until the fire department clears us.”

    Customer: “It’s probably nothing. I will be real quick. Just let me get my stuff and I will be gone and you guys can continue.”

    Me: “Sir, that is not up to me to decide. We have to let the fire department finish what they are doing. It is for our safety.”

    Customer: *frustrated* “Fine! If you are not going to let me just grab a few things, I will take my business somewhere else!”

    Page 369/405First...367368369370371...Last