White In New Jersey, What A Concept

| New Jersey, USA | Uncategorized

(The store has a policy where if customers bring in empty printer cartridges they would receive a free ream of white paper. However, the store would only take a few brands.)

Customer: “I have these printer cartridges and I’d like to receive my free paper.”

Coworker: “I’m sorry ma’am but we don’t accept these brand.”

Customer: “You can’t be serious, what else am I going to do with them?”

Coworker: “Well the sign over there states which brands we take, but we can recycle them for you.”

(The customer turns to me.)

Customer: “Is this a race thing? Is it because I’m white?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “I’m serious. I demand to know if this is because I’m white!”

That’s What She Said

| Abbotsford, BC, Canada | Uncategorized

Me: “… so your purchase comes to [amount].”

Customer: “Alright, on debit please.”

Me: “Would you like a bag with that?”

Customer: “Sure. I’ll just hold it open as wide as I can and you shove it in there.”

Me: *laughs* “Have a nice day, ma’am.”

Unholier Than Thou

| Stockton, CA, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for your purchase, Mr. [customer’s name]!”

(Out of nowhere, the guy literally goes insane and starts to jump over the counter, screaming…)

Customer: “How dare you take my name in vain!”

(Luckily, my manager is a bouncer for his second job and walks over.)

My manager: “What’s going on?”

Customer: “Nothing…” *back to normal, leaves quietly*

This Can Not End Well, Part 2

| Huntsville, AL, USA | Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling ***, how can I help you today?”

Caller: “Do y’all sell erotic films?”

Me: “… No, sir.”

Caller: “Hmm. You know where I can get some bullets?”

Me: “Nowhere within a hundred miles of here!” *click*

Related: This Can Not End Well

Please Burn Before Returning

| Phoenix, AZ, USA | Uncategorized

(I work at a large outdoor equipment store. ¬†I had an older woman approach the register with a female urinary device — which is used for winter mountaineering, so that women can use pee bottles in their tents.)

Me: ¬†”Howdy. Did you find everything you were looking for?”

Customer: ¬†”Well, I’m looking at this — do they work well?”

Me: ¬†”Uh, well, I imagine so, but I don’t have any experience with that product.”

Customer: ¬†”Can I return it if it doesn’t work?”

Me: ¬†”We have a 100% satisfaction guarantee on everything we sell here in the store. I will ask, however, that if you return it, you clean it first and double bag it!”

Page 364/455First...362363364365366...Last