Not Always Right on Facebook Not Always Right on Twitter Not Always Right Unfiltered on Tumblr
Featured Story:
  • Crime Can Be A Vicious Cycle
    (1,826 thumbs up)
  • October Theme Of The Month: Coupon Complications!
    Submit your story today!

    How Nicknames Are Born, Part 2

    | Berkshire County, MA, USA |

    Customer: “Hey, can you tell me where the rope is? I’ve been looking all over for it, but can’t seem to find it.”

    Me: “Oh, yeah it’s just over this way.”

    (I lead him to the hardware aisle, and halfway down there’s a big sign that says “Ropes” with a picture of a rope on it.)

    Me: “Right down there.¬†There’s actually a sign there that says ‘Ropes’.”

    Customer: “You’re f***ing douche bag, you know that?!”

    Me: *laughs, thinking he’s joking*

    Customer: “That was intentional, and I WILL talk to your manager!”

    Me: “I apologize–”

    Customer: “Anytime you wanna come to my house, you just lemme know, Dingleballs!”

    (And from that day forward, my nickname at work was “Dingleballs”.)

    Related:
    How Nicknames Are Born

    So That’s What Those Other Buttons Are For

    | Costa Mesa, CA, USA |

    Me: “Thank you for calling, how can I help?”

    Caller: “Is there a Kristie there?”

    Me: “We have a Kristie, but is she an older woman or younger woman?”

    Caller: “Older. She’s like a manager.”

    Me: “Oh… well, then you need to call the Newport Beach store. She’s at that one.”

    Caller: “Oh! Okay, what’s their number?”

    Me: *gives number*

    Caller: “Okay… now, can you transfer me?”

    Me: “Um… no, we don’t do that. We’re not a call center.”

    Caller: “Okay, so how do I call them?”

    Me: “… You dial the number I just gave you.”

    Caller: “But how do I do that?”

    Me: “You dial 1, then the numbers I gave you.”

    Caller: “Is that it?”

    Me: “Can I ask how you dialed this store?”

    Caller: “I dialed 411!”

    Me: “Have you been 411-ing your entire life with the phone?”

    Caller: “Of course. How else do you dial other people?!”

    Me: “Uhh… well, then you’re all set. Thanks and have a good day.”

    So Much For Being Patriotic

    | Adelaide, Australia |

    Customer: “I’m looking for a clock radio.”

    Me: “Certainly. Our clock radios are over on these shelves here. Is there any particular style or brand you’re looking for?”

    Customer: “This one looks alright. It’s made here, isn’t it?”

    Me: “Actually, ma’am, I believe that one is manufactured in China.”

    Customer: “S***, you’re kidding! Well, what about this one?”

    Me: “That’s also a [electronics brand], ma’am; that’s also made in China.”

    Customer: “S***, I DON’T WANT ANY BLOODY CHINESE S***. SHOW ME ONE THAT ISN’T CHINESE!”

    Me: “Well, this particular model over here is a [another reputable electronics brand], with all of the same functions.”

    Customer: “Not from China?”

    Me: “No, this one’s made in Japan.”

    Customer: “S***, I TOLD YOU I DON’T WANT ANY F****** CHINESE GARBAGE! *points to first radio* “Just give me that one there.”

    Me: “Uh… ma’am, that one is made in China, and the last one wasn’t…”

    Customer: “DO YOU THINK I GIVE A S***?!”

    Well Played, Indeed, Part 2

    | Orange County, CA, USA |

    Me: “Thank you for calling [costume store], how may I help you?”

    Customer: “Hi, do you guys have costumes?”

    Me: *sarcastically* “No, I’m afraid we’re a tax accounting service.”

    Customer: “Oh. Can I write off a costume rental on my taxes?”

    Related:
    Well Played, Indeed

    Bagging For Trouble

    , | Ontario, Canada |

    (I was standing in line behind a group of girls who had bought a pack of pencils.)

    First girl: “Can we get a bag?”

    Cashier: “I’m sorry, I’ve already given you one. I’m afraid I can’t give you another.”

    Second girl: “Why not? The woman ahead of us got three bags!”

    Cashier: “Yes, and all three of them were full. I can’t give you another bag.”

    First girl: “That is bull****! You gave her all those bags and can’t fork over one more for me?! ”

    Cashier: “I’m sorry… no, I can’t. She needed the bags for the items she purchased. ”

    (The third girl grabs a pack of gum and throws it on the counter.)

    Third girl: “Fine. If we get this, can we get another bag?”

    Cashier: “No, you can fit that in your first bag. There are other customers wait–”

    First girl: “F*** you! You’re just doin’ this ‘cuz we’re teenagers! This is age discrimination!”

    Cashier: “I’m sorry, but–”

    Second girl: “We want to see your manager!”

    Cashier: “I need to help other customers in line. I’m sorry I can’t–”

    First girl: “You need to help me, b****! I’m asking you for a bag!”

    Cashier: “Store policy is–”

    Second girl: “We don’t give a s*** about your store policy! Just give us a d***ed bag!”

    (I was in a hurry and by this time I just wanted to get out. Figuring any plastic bag would do, I emptied one that I had already.)

    Me, to the girls: “Here, you can have this one. I don’t need it.”

    Third girl: “Excuse me? Did I ask YOU for help?”

    Me: “No, but if it’s a plastic bag you want, I honestly don’t need it.”

    Second girl: “Would you mind your own business?”

    Elderly woman behind me: “Jumping Jesus, young lady, it’s a plastic bag! You could find one in a garbage can if you wanted it that badly!”

    Page 349/414First...347348349350351...Last