October Theme Of The Month: Halloween!

Incheon Further Away From The Answer, Part 2

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Language & Words, Uncategorized

(I’m an Asian Spanish/English interpreter in charge of taking care of our Spanish speaking custumers. I approach a Mexican customer.)

Me: “Good afternoon. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Oh my god, you speak Spanish!”

Me: “Yes I do, it’s a service provided by our store for your convenience. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “But you’re Chinese!”

Me: “I’m actually Korean born and raised in Argentina, so it’s easier for me to speak in Spanish.”

Customer: “That’s not possible! Chinese people only speak Chinese!”

Me: “I assure you I’m not Chinese and cannot speak Chinese at all.”

Customer: “But…but Chinese people should speak Chinese!”

Incheon Further Away From The Answer

The Customer Is A Fool, Of This I Am Curtain

| United Kingdom | Extra Stupid, Home Improvement, Uncategorized

Customer: *holding a pair of curtains* “Excuse me, will these curtains fit in my window?”

Me: “I’m not sure Sir. Do you have the measurements of the window with you?”

Customer: *confused* “Measurements? I need to measure the window? How do I do that?”

(I hand the man a leaflet explaining how to measure windows correctly.)

Customer: “Oh, okay. I didn’t realise you had to take measurements. I just guessed it was one size fits all.”


| Toronto, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Math & Science, Uncategorized

Me: “Ma’am, would you like a bag to carry any of these items?”

Customer: “No, I’m an environmentalist. I don’t want to add to destroy our environment.”

Me: “Ma’am, security for this store requests that everyone at least receive a bag to know that you’ve bought items here.”

Customer: “You can’t tell me that I have to take a bag and I won’t have it. I refuse to contribute to the garbage problem!”

Me: “Fine, would you like to keep these hangers that your clothes came with?”

Customer: “No, just throw them out.”

They Cry Real Tears Too

| Keene, NH, USA | Extra Stupid, Uncategorized

(I watch as a customer unfolds every single shirt at a table, holds it up, and then puts it back. She walks to the next table and I begin refolding the shirts.)

Customer: “Oh, wow!”

Me: “Is something wrong, ma’am?”

Customer: “No, nothing. I just didn’t realize they got real people to fold the shirts!”

You Gotta Be Flushing Kidding Me

| Chicago, IL, USA | Rude & Risque, Uncategorized

Customer: “Do you all have a public bathroom?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. It’s out of order.”

Customer: “What! What’s wrong with it?”

Me: “Well, someone clogged to toilet with paper towels and it doesn’t flush.”

Customer: “Well, can I use it and not flush?”

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