In(Console)able

| Connecticut, USA | Technology, Uncategorized

(A young little girl walks up to the one of the cashiers.)

Girl: “Do you have any ?”

Me: “I’m sorry, sweetie. We’re all out right now.”

Girl: “Can you go in the back and make one?”

Me: “We can’t make [consoles]. We get shipped the [consoles] to sell.”

(With a sullen look, the little girl walks away and comes back soon after with her mother.)

Mother: “You don’t have any [consoles] currently?”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am, we do not.”

Mother: “Well, can you go in the back and make one?”

Who Is The Dumbest Of Them All

| Winnipeg, MB, Canada | Bizarre, Uncategorized

Customer: “Are these mirrors weird?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “These mirrors, are they weird?”

Me: “Not to my knowledge.”

Customer: *looks in mirror* “But that’s not me!”

Playing The Name Game

| Lynnwood, WA, USA | Family & Kids, Funny Names, Uncategorized

(A customer calls in with a question. This is during heavy snow, so traveling to a store is a big deal.)

Customer: “Hi I’m looking for [name of video game], but not [game with very similar name]. I’ve called in everywhere and no one seems to have it.”

Me: “Okay, Let me just look that up for you.”

(I proceed with looking up the game and find out that they stopped making the series and that there wasn’t in fact even a game by the title she wanted.)

Me: “Okay it looks like we have [game with similar name] but they never made [game she wanted].”

Customer: “Oh great! I’ll come right down to pick it up! I can’t believe you have it!”

(The customer hangs up before I can repeat that we didn’t have it and that it doesn’t exist. Later in the day my boss informs me a lady up front wants to talk to me; I dread going to the front to a woman who has driven through to snow to look for a game doesn’t exist.)

Customer: “Hi, [my name]! I just wanted to thank you in person for helping me find [game she wanted]. My son was looking for it everywhere!”

(As she says this, she holds up the game with the similar title.)

Me: “You’re… welcome?”

Son: “Mom! You’ve been calling it the wrong name all day!”

See-Through Excuses

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Books & Reading, Extra Stupid, Uncategorized

(A customer comes in with four boxes of our crystal product. They are all broken and foggy.)

Me: “Oh no, what happened to these?”

Customer: “I just tried cleaning them and they all broke!”

Me: “How did you clean these?”

Customer: ” I put them in my dishwasher, of course!”

Me: “Ma’am, these are very delicate crystal figurines. They shouldn’t even be put in water.”

Customer: “Oh, please! Like I’m going to bother cleaning them myself!”

Salvation Barmy

| Downingtown, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Uncategorized

(We take electronics and recycle them for people.)

Me: “Thank you for calling! How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, do you recycle clothes?”

Me: “Clothes? No, we only take electronics. You should try the homeless charity across the street.”

Caller: “I don’t want to give them to homeless people. I just want to recycle them!”

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