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    Yukon See It On A Map, Part 3

    | USA |

    (A customer is trying to use a vending machine. It doesn’t work, so she comes up to me.)

    Customer:“Excuse me, my bills wont work. Can I exchange you for a five?”

    (I don’t carry any cash on the shop floor.)

    Me: “Sorry. All I have is this.”

    (I pull out a Canadian five dollar bill.)

    Customer: “What the heck is that?”

    Me: “It’s a Canadian bill.”

    (The customer continues to look confused.)

    Customer: “What’s Canadian?”

    Me: “It’s the country right above you. Canada?”

    (The customer looks up to the ceiling, perplexed.)

    Related:
    Yukon Not Spend It
    Yukon Not Believe This Juan
    Yukon Spend It
    Yukon See It On A Map, Part 2
    Yukon See It On A Map

    Because Oosb’s Just Don’t Cut It Any More

    | England, UK |

    (A couple of customers walk up to the counter. They are purchasing a home cinema system.)

    Me: “Do you need any HDMI cables with this?”

    Customer #1: “Any what?”

    Customer #2: “No.”

    Me: “Okay, that’ll be–”

    Customer #2, to customer #1: “Wait. Hujdimmi?”

    Customer #1: “Oh! Hujdimmi!”

    Me: “HDMI, yes.”

    Customer #1: “Yes. We need hujdimmi.”

    Sweater Mystery Unravels

    | USA | Top

    (I am working at the customer service desk. A conservatively dressed woman in her early sixties walks up to the counter.)

    Me: “Hi. What can I help you with today?”

    Customer: “Just a return.”

    (She pulls out a very garish holiday sweater, covered entirely in bright red sequins.)

    Me: “Okay, was there anything wrong with it?”

    Customer: “No. I just must have been really f****** high when I bought it. Look at it! It’s hideous! I don’t even remember buying this thing. I must have been really baked. D***, this is an ugly sweater!”

    Best Just Throw In The Towel On This One

    | Woodland Park, NJ, USA |

    (A customer comes up to the register with two hand towels. They are on clearance.)

    Customer: “The sign said these were buy one, get one free.”

    Me: “Well, actually they’re clearance. So you’re saving $2.”

    Customer: “I want what the sign says.”

    Me: “I’m sorry about the sign being wrong, but you’re actually saving more money by them being on clearance.”

    Customer: “You’re not listening to what I’m saying. I don’t care about saving money.”

    (I charge her the extra two dollars.)

    This Customer Is Literally Peanuts

    | Williamsburg, VA, USA |

    (The customer picks up a gift card. It has a picture of a pressed peanut plant on it.)

    Customer: “What’s this?”

    Me: “It’s a peanut plant. We have a local artist that does designs in pressed flowers.”

    Customer: “That’s not what this is.”

    Me: “Well, a peanut plant isn’t a flower. But this is Virginia, and we do like our peanuts!

    Customer: “I mean, this is not a plant!”

    Me: “It’s a card with a picture of a plant on it.”

    Customer: “A card? Well, you shouldn’t say it’s a plant then. It’s misleading.”


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