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    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 4

    , | Atlanta, GA, USA |

    (I am shopping at a store I used to work at and am approached by several customers before I realize I am wearing the same blue/khaki colors as in their uniform. I am trying to find something when I am approached by an angry lady.)

    Customer: “The TV you sold me isn’t working!”

    Me: “I don’t work–”

    Customer: “You have no idea what you’re talking about and sold me a horrible TV. I demand to talk to your manager!”

    Me: “Fine, go find him.”

    Customer: “Really? Is that how you’re going to handle this? Fine, I will!”

    (I go back to shopping but watch her walk around to find my former manager. She returns with him in tow.)

    Customer: “He’s the one that sold me the broken TV last week, and now he’s being rude. You need to do something about him.”

    Manager: “Ma’am, he hasn’t worked here in almost a year. He–”

    Customer: “I want him fired.”

    Manager: “Uh, okay, you’re fired.”

    Me: “Cool, see you later, man.”

    Customer: *smug, evil look*

    Me: *goes back to shopping*

    Related:
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 3
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 2
    I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here

    Because 8 Bajillion Signs Are Always The Answer, Part 2

    , | Nebraska, USA |

    Me: “Your total will be [total price].”

    Customer: “That seems a little high. Were the Imaginext items buy one, get one free?”

    (I check the items and see if they’re scanning correctly in the register.)

    Me: “Yes, they are, but you have 3 Imaginext items and one non-Imaginext item, so that won’t ring up on sale.”

    Customer: “Well, they’re all in the same aisle!”

    Me: “Well, yes, but just because one item is on sale doesn’t mean everything in the aisle is on sale as well.”

    Customer: “Well, you should put that on your signs!”

    Related:
    Because 8 Bajillion Signs Are Always The Answer

    2 Good 2 Be True

    , | Miami, FL, USA |

    (I am working in the young men’s department of a large department store. My department contains athletic clothing, including swimwear. A customer is looking at a large rack of bathing suits that are on clearance.)

    Me: “Hello, how are you, sir?”

    Customer: “Fine, thank you. I can’t believe all these bathing suits are so cheap!”

    Me: “It’s officially the fall season, so all of our bathing suits are reduced for clearance.”

    (The customer mumbles something about $2.00 and hands me the suit he’s holding, which is made by one of the most expensive brands we carry.)

    Me: “I’ll be happy to check the price for you.”

    (I walk to the register, which is nearby, and check the price. It rings up for $39.00.)

    Me: “Sir, this suit is on sale for $39.00.”

    Customer: “The price tag says it’s $2.00.”

    Me: “It was originally $78.00, but now it’s $39.00.”

    (I point to the price tag, which very clearly in large numbers says the original price and the reduced price.)

    Customer: “No, it says ‘Now 2.’ Two dollars, see?”

    (He points to the tag, which has a very tiny number 2, much smaller than where it says $39.00, under the word “Now”.)

    Me: “I see. That just means it’s the second reduction. The price is $39.00.”

    Customer: “Well, that’s confusing! You shouldn’t put that it’s $2.00. They all say they’re $2.00. I don’t want to pay more than $2.00!” *leaves in a huff*

    Signs Our Educational System Is Going South

    | Tel Aviv, Israel | Extra Stupid

    Me: “Thank you, have a nice day.”

    Customer: “That’s an interesting accent. Where are you from?”

    Me: “South Africa.”

    Customer: “Where’s that?”

    Me: “In Africa.”

    Customer: “Where’s Africa?”

    We Call Them Magic Voice Boxes

    | Buffalo, NY, USA | Technology

    (A customer comes in to return a phone she bought in June. Our store has a strict 30 day return policy on electronics and it is now September. I explain this to the customer and she leaves, only to return a few minutes later.)

    Customer: “You said it was 30 days for electronics, but this is a phone.”

    Me: “A phone is an electronic device.”

    Customer: “Really? I didn’t know that.”

    Me: “The policy is actually for all items from the electronics department. Even a TV stand would have a 30 day return period.”

    Customer: “Oh, okay.” *walks away shaking head* “I didn’t know phones were electronic.”

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