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  • July Theme Of The Month: Great Timing!

    Get The Independent Jeans

    | GA, USA | At The Checkout, Family & Kids

    (A young girl drives a cart load of her younger sister and some clothing to my register. I always hate to begin checking children out without their parents present. This girl appears to be about seven years old, and the younger sister is three. The seven year old begins to grab items out of the buggy when she realizes that her sister is stepping on some of her items. She begins fussing at her sister as if she is her mother.)

    Seven year old: *to her sister* “I done told you not to be standing on my stuff. Get out of this buggy, little girl!”

    Me: “Let’s wait to check you out until mom is ready okay, sweetie?”

    Seven year old: “She’s ready!” *yells to her mother, who is still shopping* “Let’s go!”

    Mom: “Okay, I’m ready!”

    (I begin scanning her items and come upon a pair of jeans that is on sale.)

    Me: *to the mom* “This pair of jeans is part of our ‘Buy One, Get One’ offer. If you’re interested in a second pair, it’ll only cost you a dollar extra.”

    Mom: “Well honey, go grab another pair real quick!”

    Seven year old: “Ugh, you go do it!” *throws the pair of jeans at her mother*

    Mom: “Okay, what kind do you want? Something similar or a diff—”

    Seven year old: “Oh, forget it! I’ll do it because you will take forever!”

    (She snatches the jeans from her mother and storms off, as dramatically as only a child can manage.)

    Me: “How old is she?”

    Mom: “Oh, she’s seven. She’s just so independent. She’s something else isn’t she?”

    Me: “Absolutely, ma’am!”

    Word To The Whys

    | Austin, TX, USA | Liars & Scammers

    Me: “Thank you for calling [business]; how may I help you?”

    Customer: “I can’t believe you’d do this to me! I’ve been a customer for years! I’ve spent literally thousands of dollars with you! Why would you do this to me?!”

    Me: “I’m sorry, but what’s happened?”

    Customer: “You charged me for two [products], but only sent one. Why are you trying to rip off a loyal customer?!”

    Me: “I’m sorry your order wasn’t complete. I’ll get the missing item shipped to you today.”

    Customer: “But why did you do this to me?”

    Me: “I think it was just a mistake. We wouldn’t do something like that intentionally.”

    Customer: “Of course you did! The packing slip clearly says ‘F*** you!’ on it!”

    Me: “I’m very sorry to hear that! Can you send me a photo so I can forward it to my manager?”

    Customer: “Why? Don’t you believe me?!”

    Me: “I need to see the handwriting to figure out who wrote it.”

    Customer: “Fine. I’ll mail it back.”

    Me: “I would prefer it if you email a photo, but mailing it back is fine. In the meantime, I’ll get the missing [product] sent to you.”

    Customer: “I still can’t believe you’d do this to me!”

    (The customer mails in the slip, and sure enough, written in crayon in a very unsteady hand that I don’t recognize, is ‘F*** you!’. However, it’s followed in the same handwriting and crayon by, ‘I can’t believe you’d do this to me!’)

    Waxing Lyrical About Christmas Kindness

    | OH, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

    (Several customers are purchasing wax cubes. You’re supposed to melt them in a wax burner, but I can’t help but sniff them while I’m ringing them out. I didn’t want to stop smelling one in particular. However, after seeing one of the customers looking at me funny, I quickly close it and put it with the others in the bag.)

    Customer #1: “If you like those so much, you should buy some!”

    Me: “Oh, I don’t have a wax burner.”

    Customer #2: “You should get one! They smell really good when they’re melted, too!”

    Me: “I’m a college student. I don’t have money!”

    (The customers leave, only to later come back back through my line. They’re purchasing another lip balm and wax burner along with candy cane-scented wax. They start to walk away with just their lip balms and don’t grab their other items.)

    Me: “Hey, wait, you forgot your bag!”

    Customer #1: “That’s for you. Merry Christmas. You deserve it for trying to do something with your life!”

    (I was nearly in tears for the rest of the evening! Thank you, kind customer!)

    Wait Until You Hear The Sticking Point

    | USA | Bizarre

    (A male customer walks in with a large stick.)

    Customer: “Hi, do you guys sell baby shoes?”

    Me: “Yes we do, sir. They are right over there.” *points to the shoes*

    Customer: “Okay, thanks.”

    (He walks over and proceeds to go through them. A few minutes later, he brings to the counter some baby shoes.)

    Me: “These are very cute shoes. You have nice taste.”

    Customer: “Thank you.”

    (He then takes the shoes and puts them on the end of his stick.)

    Customer: “The bottoms getting a little worse for wear and I would hate to get rid of this nice stick. Shoes should do the trick!” *smiles and walks out*

    Thinking Outside The Box, Part 3

    | Ottawa, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Holidays, Spouses & Partners, Theme Of The Month, Top

    (I work for a big box retail location. It has been a busy day and I have been alone for a lot of my shift. I have been helping an elderly couple look for a TV for their grandchild for Christmas.)

    Wife: “I think this is the one that we want. Can we test it out to make sure it works?”

    Me: “Sure, just give me a couple minutes to set it up…”

    (I set every thing up and get everything going for them. This whole time, the husband hasn’t said a single thing.)

    Me: “Every thing seems to be in working order, but just in case, you do have 90 days to return it.”

    Wife: “That sounds great! By the way, do you have one that hasn’t been opened? We’re giving it as a gift.”

    Me: “Umm…”

    Husband: *to wife* “Are you a moron? You had him open it up to make sure it worked and now you want one that he didn’t open? We’re taking the open one and if she doesn’t like it, we’ll return it.”

    (The wife had a shocked expression on her face but didn’t protest it. I, on the other hand, wanted to shake that man’s hand for being the smartest person I had dealt with all day.)

    Related:
    Thinking Outside The Box, Part 2

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