Konnichi-woah

| Whitehorse, YT, Canada | Food & Drink, Top, Tourists/Travel

(I work in a tourist souvenir shop. On this day, we receive much-needed maple products, including maple candy, syrup and the like. I am busy labelling the new stock as my coworker receives the stock.)

Me: “Well, I know there will be Japanese tourists in today.”

Coworker: “…Huh?”

Me: “Last time we got our maple shipment in, we sold half of it before it was all completely in the system. They just seem to know when we have it. The Japanese tourists just have a sense for it. We’ll be busy tonight.”

Coworker: “Oh, really?”

Me: “Yep, just you wait…”

(An hour later, two Japanese tourists come into the store and take a look around as we are busy working. When they are finished, both come up to the counter with baskets of maple syrup bottles. Once I’m finished helping both of them, I turn to my coworker.)

Me: “Well what have you got to say to that?”

Coworker: *not believing me* “No comment.”

(About twenty minutes later, I hear the door open, but it doesn’t shut immediately. Curious, I look up in the direction of the door.)

Me: “Oh, look, they brought friends!”

Coworker: *looks up and at the front* “Holy crap!”

(A group of about nine Japanese tourists walk in, all immediately heading for our ‘maple’ section of the store. Due to the small size of the store, it is a lot of people to have in at once. We help them as best we can. Despite there being a huge language barrier, I recognize some words and we are able to help each one of them as they patiently wait their turn in line. Once they are all finished and things are once again quiet, I turn once again to my coworker.)

Me: “So, you believe me now?”

Always Jump At The Chance For Fun

| CT, USA | At The Checkout, Awesome Customers, Bizarre, Top

(A customer in her forties comes through my line, and we exchange pleasantries as I ring her out. It’s a perfectly normal interaction.)

Me: “Do you have your [store] rewards card?”

Customer: “No, I don’t believe I have one.”

Me: “Well, would you like to sign up?”

(The customer agrees and I walk her through the process. Everything goes smoothly and at the end, I scan her new card and hand it to her.)

Me: “There you go!”

Customer: “Yay!”

(Suddenly, the customer starts jumping up and down in joy, waving her hands and looking for all the world like an ecstatic six year old. This goes on for a while and, not knowing what else to do, I wind up jumping with her. Just as suddenly as she started, she calms down and stops jumping.)

Woman: “There, wasn’t that exciting? Now you’ll be cheery for the whole rest of the day!”

(I certainly was!)

Setting Back But Moving Forward

| Sacramento, CA, USA | Awesome Customers, Money, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a watch repair shop and one of the services we perform is re-setting a customer’s watch when the time changes, which we do for free. Some digital watches are difficult to set the time on. An older man with an Irish accent comes up to my counter.)

Customer: “Pardon me, could you set my watch for me? I can’t figure out how to set it back an hour.”

Me: *smiling* “No problem. These things can be pretty tricky to set.”

(I proceed to set his digital watch to the correct time in about a minute and hand it back to him.)

Me: “Here you go, sir.”

Customer: “You did that fast! What do I owe you?”

Me: “Oh, there’s no charge for that.”

Customer: “Really? No, I can’t go away without giving you something.”

(He proceeds to pull a $5 bill out of his wallet and hand it to me.)

Me: “Really, sir, you don’t have to do that, and there’s no charge. It was my pleasure.”

Customer: “Well, you’ve been so nice and did that so fast, stop by the pub on your way home and have yourself a drink! You deserve it!”

(He waves as he walks away. And yes, I did have that drink!)

No Kidding About The Kid

| MD, USA | Awesome Customers, Family & Kids, Theme Of The Month, Wild & Unruly

(A customer is loudly talking on her phone while ignoring her young son. He’s already thrown his jacket to the floor and has run around the store several times, bumping into other customers. Suddenly the boy grabs a cake server off the shelf and begins waving it around in the air making light-saber noises.)

Me: “Honey, be careful with that. I wouldn’t want to see you get hurt.”

Customer #1: “[Son]!”

(The little boy drops the cake server then begins stomping around the store once again.)

Customer #1: *to the phone* “So yeah, these ones have butterflies on them.”

(The little boy seizes this opportunity to run behind the counter and begin messing with the engraving machines. I immediately pick him up and place him next to his mother.)

Me: “Here, honey. Stay with your mom.”

Customer #1: “DON’T TOUCH MY BABY! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!”

Me: “Ma’am, he could have seriously hurt himself. We work with dangerous equipment.”

Customer #1: “I can’t believe you would touch my son! How dare you!”

(At this point, I’m biting my tongue to keep from telling her off when another customer interjects.)

Customer #2: “Lady, if you would get off the d*** phone and watch your brat this nice woman wouldn’t have to save his life!”

Customer #1: “I’ll never shop here again!” *to me* “There has to be a law against molesting children like that! I’ll make sure you lose your job for this!” *storms out*

Clear This Customer From Memory

| MI, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid

(I am a cashier at a grocery store. When a customer is making a purchase over $25 with a credit card, it is required that they sign for the transaction.)

Me: “Okay, now the PIN pad is just requesting your signature to finish the transaction.”

Customer: *after signing* “Should I hit enter or clear?”

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